Unmistakable Love

Chapter 16-Where does the good go

Thea runs over and hugs me, "What the hell Felicity!"

Oliver gives her a look and she shuts up.

"No, its okay. I guess I just needed a little time to myself," I say.

Sometimes I feel like a prisoner. I haven't gone back to work, Oliver still pays me and I live in his house, and I cant go anywhere without someone jumping on my back.

"Why dont we go out somewhere? The park, the mall, anything. Im tired of sitting around all day locked in a mansion," I say.

Oliver and Thea look at each other.

"Yeah sure," Thea says.

I can tell by the look on Oliver's face he doesn't think its a good idea.

"Alright then," I say, excited to finally go out somewhere.

We all go our separate ways to get ready.

I've got no makeup no decent clothes, nothing. Everything I own is at my house.

I sit on my bed and reach into my pillow case. I grab the water bottle that Wayne gave me and take a few slow, long sips. God I missed alcohol. Especially this stuff.

I close the cap and stuff it back into my pillow case and head to Thea's room.

I knock at the door and she opens it, wearing a beautiful grey and white dress.

"You look great Thea!" I say.

"Thank you," She says.

"I promise after today I will get my own stuff, but can I borrow something in the meantime?"

Thea welcomes me into her room and helps me pick out something. We decide on Levi's jeans and a very nice top.

--

We arrive at the mall and Im ecstatic. I know it sounds stupid but I hadn't been since before this mess. I like seeming normal.

We walk around for a good half hour and I have boughten 2 things so far.

As we start to make our way to another store I hear a child laughing. I stop and look in the direction of the child. I havent heard a genuinely happy laugh like that in the longest time. Maybe I just dont pay enough attention normally, but its nice to hear stuff like that.

There is a man with the child, who is running and the child is running behind him.

I cant help but smile. The kid looks so happy. I never had a father who would take me places and make me laugh. I barely have any childhood memories of my father.

After a few minutes of watching they get closer to me since they are running around.

"Who's this little guy," I say to the man while looking at the child.

"This is Donny," The man says.

My smile fades and I back up quickly.

My throat feels like its closing and I try my best to fight the tears.

I start breathing dramatically heavy. I cant catch my breath and Oliver and Thea quickly notice.

I look around frantically for a close wall. The stairwell railing is only a few feet away. I do my best to jog over to it.

Im dizzy and suddenly my weakness has caught up to me. I slump myself to the ground and Oliver sits down in front of me, Thea sits beside me.

"Hey, you're okay. What happened?" Oliver says. Looking into my eyes, he grabs my shaky hands into his strong, calm ones.

"Donny," I say between breaths. That one word has the power to cause such emotional problems for me.

I dont even realize that Im crying until I feel Oliver's thumb swipe across my face and wipe them away.

My breath hitches and I look up into Oliver's eyes. "Can you do me a huge favour," I say.

"Anytime," Oliver says.

"Go over there and get me that wheelchair," I try to keep my voice steady, which makes it shake even more.

Oliver comes back with the wheelchair and Thea and Oliver wait for me until im ready.

Shit.

My stomach flips and I turn my head to face inside the stairwell and hurl all over the stairs and the ground below.

I wipe my mouth with my hand and Thea looks down at my hand and then slowly back at me.

I look down at my hand and there are little blood clots all where I wiped my mouth.

I try to get up into the wheelchair to break the awkwardness, but stumble and fall back down. Im not strong enough to even stand up.

Without me even asking, I feel Oliver and Thea's hands go around my body and lift me up.

Oliver starts to push me toward the doors and I press the brakes on.

"What are you doing," I say.

"Felicity, you need to go to a hospital. You cant even stand up, let alone go shopping," Oliver says and turns around to face me.

"Im not gonna let a little bad day for me ruin your perfectly good day. We are going to finish shopping and have a good day. Im not going to a hospital. They are just gonna run the same tests that they have been forever and its going to be a waste of precious life. Now turn me around," I say, and press the brakes off.

Oliver goes behind me and the wheelchair stays put. Thea quickly picks me up out of the wheelchair.

"No! No what the hell Thea! Put me down!!" I yell and frantically try to push her off of me. Im very weak so she barely flinches when I lash out.

And Im sure the whole mall can hear me. God this is embarrassing.

I don't want to go to the hospital because I don't want them to run tox screens because then Oliver and Thea will find out that I snorted coke and drank vodka. They think Ive been clean for weeks now.

The next thing I know, we are in the car and driving. Thea puts me in the back seat with her while Oliver drives.

"Thea," I say.

She looks over at me.

"Im scared," I say.

She gives me a look of sorrow and puts her arm around me. She leans her head into the empty spot between my neck and collar bone.

"Its okay," Thea says quietly.

"And Im sorry." I add on and wait for her response.

"For what?"

"You will know in a few hours," I say, dreading the moment the tox screen results come back and regretting that I ever did that.