||Say yes...please?|| {Unedited}

Chapter Thirty Three

"Iris & Derek"

"Maybe it was a beginning that started with the end."

Gazing back into those blue lucid eyes she had been eluded from the reality; lost in the trance that enwrapped her in the embrace of solace and serenity.

Those eyes that were brimming with nothing but love allured her to the point that she forgot the ache of the loss she just had reconciled with. A storm in her heart seemed to settle by the tranquillity radiated from his eyes. A part of her wanted to rush into his arms and to feel his heart near hers, beating along, to feel the warmth of his body slowly reaching to hers, to feel his breath on her skin. She wanted to feel it. A part of her wanted it all, But she chose otherwise...

With the ache in her heart and tears in her eyes, she walked past Derek, holding her breath.

She walked briskly as if every step was rooting her to the ground, right there in that barren field.

Upon reaching at the car she sat on the bonnet and rested her head on the windshield.

She took a deep intake of air to fill her parched lungs.

Every nerve of her body seemed to give up in that moment. All the strength in her seemed to crumble down to heap. The pain of the truth was unburdening itself on her lone soul, making every inch of her heart to cry out in pain.

She screeched loudly and held her face in her hands sobbing lightly.

She was never strong. And acting like one made it even harder. She had broken into parts and every part felt differently than the other, a part wanted love, other peace, and a part of her wanted to feel every ounce of pain and ache she had been cowardly running from.

She wanted all those tears to come out, which she had filled somewhere inside her to make the truth more of a mirage. To not to give into the reality of his demise. But now there is no need to run away from the only things that have been holding her back. She let them flow; every moment of despair she had spent, wishing it to be a nightmare through her eyes. She wanted to let them go...just let them go.

♥

A brittle noise shred away the reverie and pulled Derek out of it. He saw Iris walking out of the door with her head bowed and shoulders slumped.

He wanted to run after her and to embrace her from the wreck moment she was in. But it wasn't right to do so. It wasn't his place to begin with. She needed to do it by herself. Derek looked away from the door back to the grave and closed his eyes with a sigh waiting this moment to pass in a blink. 

He opened his eyes slowly and put his hand on his hips exhaling sharply. Each passing moment with the thought of Iris being outside alone, fighting, accepting this truth made it harder for him to breathe. He wanted to be there for her, to be with her. But....something stopped him from doing so. Something that held him from moving out but whatever it was, Derek defied it and moved out.

While walking out of the barn, his eyes searched for Iris all around but stopped when his gaze found her sitting on the bonnet of the car with her head high, gazing at the moon longingly like a patrich, her chest was calmly heaving up and down. 

He stopped in his tracks as he recalled what his mother said once, 'We don't find love where we expect it the most. We find love where it is hard to reach. But if you find the love of your life that makes you question your own sensibility then no matter how many mountains you have to climb or the rivers and oceans you have to cross, just pursue it with all your heart because that's where all the strength lies.'

Derek looked down at his feet and closed his eyes slowly. Taking long breath, he looked up and started walking again.

With each step that led to Iris, Derek notices that how much she was engrossed in her thoughts that she didn't even acknowledges his presence.