Watching the Mockingjay Fall

Chapter 53

Katniss POV:

Four Days. That's how long I've been unconscious for. I know because I can still hear everything that's going on around me. I know that Prim comes in every second hour, and holds my hand. My mother comes to see me after her nightshift. I haven't heard Peeta, or Gale's voices for three days. I begin to think that they have finally come to their senses and left me.

It isn't until the sixth day of nightmares, that I finally overhear Beetee and Haymitch talking.
"She's going to freak out when she realises that he's not here." Who? Beetee's voice echo's in my mind.
"Maybe we should just leave her unconscious. When she wakes up, just drug her again until the whole thing's over, and act like nothing ever happened?" Trust that to be Haymitch's suggestion.
"She'd still react the same way, but she'd probably be more annoyed."
"Someone should really tell her that Peeta has gone with them, to the Capitol."
What? When did this happen? I have to be with him! I can't lose him. If I lose Peeta, then I lose myself.
I will fall into a deep, dark hole, that I will never get out of. I need him.
I need to wake up.
Katniss, I tell myself, you need to wake up. Please. You have to find Peeta. You have to. Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!

I do wake up. Immediately all I can hear is a loud beep of a machine. Doctors and nurses flood the room, along with my mother and Prim.
"Katniss!" They all say.
I try to speak, but no words come. Why can't I speak? I have to find Peeta. Find Peeta.
I need him. His hands, his lips. His smile and his smell. I need his hair, and his eyes.
"P... Peeta?" A raspy voice leaves my mouth that is not mine.
Everyone stops talking, moving.
My mother is the first one to speak.
"Katniss, Peeta isn't here." She says softly.
"Where is he then?" My voice is filled with anger, and I sit up.
"Katniss, he's in the Capitol." This time it's Prim who speaks.
"There's... too many people in this room." My mother ushers them out, until it's just us. My mother, Prim, and I.
I start to cry. Really horrible, ugly tears. They stream down my face like raindrops from a stormy cloud.
"I have to go to him." I whisper.
"I know, Katniss. But you can't. I'm so sorry." My mother leans down and hugs me.
"I love you, mom." Those four words haven't left my mouth in... well... since dad died.
Her eyes well up with tears. "I love you too, Katniss."
"I love you Prim."
"Love you, Katniss."

Johanna comes to visit after dinner.
"I hear that Peeta went to the Capitol?" She asks, perching on the end of my bed.
I nod.
"You must be so disappointed that you can't go."
I nod again.
"Read this once everyone's in bed, Okay?" She hands me a piece of paper and then leaves as quick as she came.

There's a supplies hovercraft leaving at 10 o'clock tomorrow morning. Headed to the Capitol.

The next time my mother and Prim visit, I tell them goodbye, very discreetly. I tell them that I love them. I think Prim knows that something's up, but she doesn't say anything, just hugs my harder and longer than usual.

At nine o'clock the next morning, I sneak into my Mockingjay suit and escape to the hovercraft. Johanna meets me halfway with my bow.
"Thanks again for everything." I say, and we hug. She distracts an officer, flirting with him as I get on the hovercraft. I laugh to myself. Who knew Johanna was good at that?

Next stop, the Capitol.

The ride is bumpy, and the whole hovercraft jolts as we land in the Capitol. The big door opens, and I make a run for it, but as soon as I am outside, there is a crowd of people. I internally groan. I should have thought this through.
I look down at the ground, not making eye contact with anyone. They all circle around me.
That's it. They're going to send me home.
Then I hear a voice, calling my name.
"Katniss?" Peeta's voice is filled with shock and surprise. He runs towards me, wrapping his arms!s around mine.
"You're awake." He sighs with relief.
I smile into his shoulder.
He's there, like he always is, to pull me out of the deep, dark hole, that's called my mind.