Is it Forbidden Doc?

Tears

Move in with...Alex?

"you want me to live with you?" i asked slightly confused and very nervous.

"i mean, this is tough....i'm moving" he said. Moving, i repeated once again in my head.

"moving where?" my mind was shocked but i asked anyway.

"up north. I got the chief job on surgery" he said lifting my face towards his eyes. i couldn't believe my ears, or him.

"Alex. i can't! i'm studying and you know that." i wanted to ask when did he apply for this job, and since when did he knew he was moving.

We discussed everything for a moment, he told me that he applied even before meeting me, and that he received the final call about a week ago, he was just sinking the information in and deciding what to do with us. But the thing is. There couldn't be an us with 10 hours between us.

Alex looked concerned but calm. He just waited for me to think all the information. He wanted us to live together, as a couple. Was i ready for that kind of change?

"i mean, i would love to, but i didn't have those plans in the first place." i wanted to finish my career and be able to reach every goal i had in mind.

And moving in with him, to another city, it would mean leave everything behind, my career, friends and my parents.

"i-i can't" i said getting up and pacing through the living room area. He just watched me with his mouth open and his eyes not believing me.

"Amelia, yes you can, because it's for a reason we are together, it's for a reason that i love you" He said nodding at his own words, trying to believe himself. Did he love me?

"this, i mean we are together, but things move slowly, you know that" i said taking my coat and went outside. This wasn't in my plans. After all he was only my first boyfriend, and i am only 21. He's 38 and trying to make a career for himself, one that he already has.

It was cold outside and i heard him, and his keys, he silently watched me as i approached his car and we got in. Not speaking.

The ride was fast and in silence. No music no chatting, just us in our thoughts.

It's Andrew Dunham the one that appeared on my mind at this time. Would he make such decisions?

Why! everything was ok between us and now all there is awkwardness. Andrew appeared in the worst moments, and i wanted Alex, no one else.

But.. if i wanted him so much then why was i doubting now. Moving together was the only option?We kissed briefly before saying goodbye, he took my purse and i took it without a word.

"we HAVE to speak Amelia and you know that" he said with sad eyes and almost pouting, to think that i was having this reaction from him was so surreal.

"yes, i know just let me sleep on it for now, Alex" i said, "i'm not the one moving, remember that" i added closing the car door and walking the steps to the building, once inside i cried, from confusion and despair, i loved him right? i loved Alex Reed, my doctor.

Azula came to me and hold me for a while just trying to understand my mumbling while i cried.

"moving in with him! we haven't even...you know!" i said and she laughed at me, for not being able to say sex. We haven't even had sex. And he's asking me to move in with him, why had that thought came to my mind? i don't know.

"then do it" she laughed cleaning my face and getting me to wet my face in the sink of the bathroom. I looked horrible, red rimmed eyes and a puffy nose, but i had my eyes shining, i was alive, Alex made me Alive.

I was feeling strong things for him, or else i wouldn't be crying my heart out. i needed to clear my mind and quickly. Do i want him, am i that in love to follow him and his dreams?

The next day he called me early into the morning and i went jogging for a while before meeting with him in the near starbucks, there we sat and he motioned for me to sit on his lap with a smile.

"i'm all sweaty Alex" i complained but he motioned for to go again and that's what i did, we were on a single table and started to cuddle some more before his name was being called. Once we took the latte's he started to caress me, like he always does.

"you are so beautiful" he breathed once again and placed a small kiss on my neck. i was blushing for this PDA Side of his.

"Alex come on." i said and tried to get away, only getting his arms closer and his hands all over my butt.

"mhhmm i want to be as close to you as possible. Yesterday was a nightmare to me"

"for me too. i cried so much"

"awwh noo baby why?"

i couldn't keep the tears away and started to speak.

"I-I don't want you to go, but at the same... time i want to finish school, here" he looked deep into my eyes with his mouth open as if words couldn't come out.

i felt more tears coming because this was it... we couldn't come with a solution.