Chapter Nineteen// Promise

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"Mornings are always so hard. To get up with motivation, with hope. I have been doing fine for a while well since the whole change. I still feel it inside me the deep pain all the time. I want to wake up happy but I never can. I try really hard, but I am also really tired of trying."

As of Tuesday I decided to start actually talking to Ms. Daniels. I couldn't take it anymore and I know that whatever I tell her, will never come out of this room. This is actually the first therapist I have actually interacted with.

"The mornings are hard but the nights are harder." I tell her.

"How so?" She asks.

"In the mornings its just emptiness, pain from the night before. At night its... its like if I was in a war with my own head. Everything just comes crashing down, pain, memorize."

She nodded showing me that she understood my pain. But did she really?

"What about the boys?" She asks.

"What about them?" I ask her.

"Have you gave them a chance?"

"Tell me what they're like?"

"Well Ashton, Is like the brother I never had. He is protective and he is just to good to me. If someone told me 3 months ago that I would meet a person that would be like a brother to me, I would have never believed them. Calum that boy is something. He is always joking around and he will get you laughing in no time. Me and him have gotten more closer since we have been working together. Its almost imposable to be sad around him. Michael he is the closet person I have to a best friend here. I feel like he understands me without me having to say much. Luke, Luke is I don't know. He is an amazing singer and I have a feeling that he will go far with the boys. Something about him makes me feel safe. Like if I belong somewhere. " I tell her.

"They sound like amazing guys Ellie. Do you like Luke?"

I felt my cheeks heat up.

"I think so."

"Do you think he likes you?" She asks

"Idk a while back he kissed me and he said he did but he told me some stuff and I am not sure he likes me or if he needs a distraction."

"Sometimes you have to give people a chance."

"I have and the people I gave a chance to are the ones that made me stop believing that there is good people in the world"

"But then you met the boys" She says.

"Yea and now I know the boys."

***

I have been laying on my bed for a while now. I then took a glance at my walls. I realize that I have been living here for quit a bit now and everything is so simple. My walls have nothing on them.

I sit up quickly with an idea. I open up my sketchbooks and look through folders to find some drawings. I lay them all out. Once I am happy on how I have laid them down. I look through the desk in my room in search for some tape. I then start taping my drawings on the wall. It takes me about two hours to finish taping them all. I walk back to admire my wall, and I really like it. It makes me feel like this is my room. It feels a bit more like home.

I hear a knock on the door. At first I thought it was Ashton but then I remember that Ashton went out to buy some new drumsticks since he had managed break most of them, and Anne was working as usual. I walked towards my room door to see who it was.

"Luke what are you doing here? How did you get in?"

"The front door was unlocked and well I assumed that Ashton forgot to lock the door again. Sorry if I scared you but I had to talk to someone and some how ended up here. Can I come in."

"uhh yea, yea come in.' I say prying the door open.

He comes in and the first thing he looks at is my wall. He walks towards the wall and studies my drawings.

Luke's POV

I see a wall full of drawings. They're are all incredible.

I put the pad of my finger on each drawing trying to admire them, understand them.

"Ellie... these are. These are so good."

"Yea I guess I'm alright." I keep on looking at them. Then there are some drawings that catch my attention. Its was the boys and I.

I point at it. "Is this us?" I ask, obviously knowing the answer to my own question.

"oh, yea. Thats you guys." She says kind of nervous. I can tell she was nervous cause I could see her bitting the inside of her cheek. "It looks exactly like us." It was a drawing of all of us with instruments. But the whole drawing was in pencil except us we were drawn in pen. We were all really detailed. "Ellie what other secret you got?" I say giggling. She stiffed up, she looked so uncomfortable.

"So what did you want to talk about?" She asks, for a second I almost forgot the confession I was about to make to her.

I walked towards the window seat where she was and sad in front of her.

"I don't know I guess me talking to you about my ex girlfriend and what happened got some stuff going in my head." I tell her.

"Oh... like what?"

"It got me thinking that ever since you came I really have let her go. She is in the past and I want to live right now. I don't want live on something that happened over a year ago. I want to live life with you Ellie. I want you to be my girlfriend. I really like you and I want to see if we can make this work." At this point she was looking straight at me. She had a smile peeking her lips. She takes a second "Okay." She says with a smile on her lips. "Okay?" I say raising my eyebrows feeling this warmness in my heart, I was ready to be rejected once again but, I wasn't and I can't believe she actually is giving me a chance.

I lean in closer to her and crash my lips on hers. Her warm lips kiss back and at this moment I felt alive.

"Don't let me regret it." She says while laying her forehead on mine still having her eyes shut. "I won't." I tell her tilting her chin up. "I promise."

*•*•*•*•*•*•*

Oh my, I think this my favorite chapter so far. I was so ready for them to finally start dating. I hope you guys don't think its to soon. This chapter was a little longer than the other ones since I suck at updating but
I will upload a new chapter on Thanks Giving for you guys!

Hope you beans have a lovely day/night.

I am annoying but please Comment//Vote so I know you guys are enjoying the book so far.

xxx

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