Timesplosion

The Adventures of Serf Chryslabum Part 1!

Chryslabum lived a simple life as a serf. She tended the land and did serf things, and she even got to hang out with her next-door neighbor, Tobias, who was her best friend in the world!

"Lalalalala look at me hanging around doing serf things!" sang Chryslabum the serf, "Hey, Tobias, do you want to do serf things with me?"

"Why did that just sound like a weird euphemism?"

"What's a euphemism?"

"Nevermind."

But one day, Tobias got sick, and the whole serf village fell into concern for the young lad.

"Hark!" cried Chryslabum, "Tobias no! Don't be sick."

"*cough cough* I'm sorry- *cough* Chrys..."

"BESTIE!!!!!!!!!"

No one in the village had the money to save poor Tobias, and it looked like it would be the end for the brave young boy. Chryslabum cried and cried, and cried some more, and she continued to cry while crying on top of her cries.

"I've already lost all of my mermaid kingdom, I can't lose you too bestie!" kercried Chrys, as she watched old-timey serf television and ate an old-timey funnel cake, because her whole entire village was actually just an anachronistic medieval-fair. But one day, Chryslabum heard a rumor.

"Hey! Did you hear? There's a spirit that lives in the king's castle!"

"What? A spirit?"

"Yeah! A great spirit! The spirit of the waves! And I heard the spirit's guardian will grant one miracle to whoever is brave enough to visit her."

"Oh wow! Did you hear that there was a half off deal at the medieval super market on Saturdays?"

"No I did not hear! You know, they'll fry anything-"

"Fry anything!" Chryslabum yelped, "Yes! Finally! My dream of living in a fried medieval hut and having fried livestock can come to fruition!- I mean, ah! That spirit! She can heal Tobias if I ask her for a miracle!"

Chryslabum knew that it would take three days for her to reach the castle, but she also knew it would take but two if she had a horse! Where could she get a horse from, though?

She decided to tell Tobias. Maybe he could help her out?

"I think that the noble's manor may have a few horses." Tobias responded, "But, you know, you could always just not go. It seems like a lot of trouble going to other places to try and find a doctor or whatever. *cough* Plus, you know, it's forbidden to- *cough**cough* It's forbidden for serf's like you to leave the fair grounds. If the situation were reversed, I'd just stay at home. Dying isn't so bad. I'd get to relax and see my grandma again."

"Don't speak like that!" Chryslabum chided her friend, "I've seen all my friends die before, and it sucked! Like, a lot. A WHOLE lot. I can't watch you die too! You're my bestie!"

"Well, Chryslabum, sometimes in life you have to- *cough*"

"Don't cough all over me! I don't want your sick germs!"

"Chrys, it's supposed to be medieval times. We're not supposed to know that germs exist."

"WHAT!?" Chryslabum screamed, "I CAN'T HEAR YOU! I'M BUSY MICROWAVING MY HOTPOCKET!"

So Chryslabum decided to get a horses from the Nobles. She knew traveling all the way to the rich people's side of the fairgrounds would be a long and arduous journey, but that wouldn't stop her from saving her bestie! So, after crying so more, Chryslabum gathered her things and she set off! It took the brave(?) Chryslabum two days to get to the fancy side of the fairgrounds, because on the way there she got distracted by watching every episode of The Wire, but when she finally made it there she was met with her first roadblock.