The Marauders Year Five Part 2 #Wattys2017

Tickle the Pear

Tickle the Pear

Peter stuck his head 'round the corner, peering down the corridor, then ducked back, pressing himself to the wall. Beside him, Remus stood, gritting his teeth 'round a good-sized clump of aconite and trying to tell himself that the smell of all the food would not make him throw up. Peter looked up at Remus. "I didn't see anyone down there. I think the coast's clear."

"Alright. What do we need to do again?" Remus asked.

"Down the hall, cut left at the end, and there's a big picture of a bowl of fruit. Tickle the pear."

"Tickle the pear."

"Yes. Tickle the pear."

"Does Sirius know about tickling the pear? I feel like he would've said a lot more than just you lot go to the kitchens."

"I've never told anyone," Peter answered. "Bilius Weasley told me." He snuck closer to the corner again and peeked once again. "Alright. Still clear. Let's go." He scurried - that's the only word Remus could think of for what he did - rushing quickly along with teensy little tiptoe-like steps, keeping to the walls, weaving as he went...

Remus walked along behind, limping slightly, lucky he was moving at all.

Sure enough, lit by a couple torches on each side, which flickered in the dark, a huge painting of a bowl of fruit hung there on the wall, a great brown-green pear in the center of the bowl. Peter leaned against the wall beside it, watching Remus come, and when he was nearly there, Remus watched a Peter reached up carefully, extended one finger, and wobbled it against the canvas right over the pear.

The pear giggled.

Peter tickled it more, adding more fingers, then both hands, until the pear was in tears, it's great bulbous bottom shaking like Kris Kringle, and a voice wheezed, "Alright, alright, you can go in... you can go in!"

The portrait swung open.

Remus leaned 'round the frame to look at the fruit bowl in curiosity, wondering who had spoken - there were no people in the painting. "What?" asked the voice he'd heard a moment before, "Ain't you never seen a talkin' pear before? Move along!"

Remus turned and followed Peter into the kitchen.

"Peter! Peter Pettigrew! Peter's here! Look, it's Peter!"

Several squeaky little voices shouted at once in glee at the sight of Peter walking in. Remus looked around. It was a sea of house elves. "Blimey," he whispered, looking about as they all rushed forward, waving and squeaking excitedly, offering cookies and butterbeer and ice cream and roast sandwiches, each desperate to be the one whose wares Peter chose to take. "And you make it sound like stealing food is a conquest." He looked at Peter with a raised eyebrow.

"Well," Peter flushed, "You saw how long a walk it was down here."

"Did I ever," Remus agreed solemnly.

It took some time for Remus and Peter to explain to the elves the purpose of them being there, and even more time to convince them to look the other way while Remus and Peter waved their wands to open the lids of all of the tea pots set out for the Valentine's Day Tea across all of the tiny little tables that spattered the staging area for the Great Hall above... Remus murmured, "Dunno, I still can't help but wonder if this is a good idea!"

"Sirius said he thought it all the way through," Peter said supportively.

"Yes, Sirius did say that," Remus answered, nodding, "And that's precisely what's got me worried."