Trying not to fall in love

letter form a stranger

I told Nat that I was going home I really didn't I was in the streets riding my bike .... With music that's was so loud everyone could hear it .... I was high.... Not cause I was happy but cause I was sad .... I was planing in going home and sleeping ... I did home I was in my room just when I got a message from my ex ... About how he actually. Thought bout me .. It wasn't nice to read ... Than I see a letter on my study table .. It's was from was not signed ... After reading the letter I broke down In to tears .... I didn't want to realize the truth I knew I was not pretty .... Or thin with a perfect shape or beautiful inside out or talented Or intelligent or hard working maybe .. I was born just to play the role of nobody .... Does god do that ...? I don't know why Ashton likes me .. I was invited to a party by I Pearson I met 5 mins ago I accepted the invite .... Like a idiot ... It's was a guy of gold ridge high .... I guess he din know I was from st . Zoin .. We went to a big fancy place ... Every one was smoking. Weed and high on maybe there 59 the shot ... I walked out until Markus pulls me in its the guy who invited me to the party ... Hey baby where are you going .. I din like it when he addressed me baby leave me mark I want to go ... Stay for I while please ... I just walk out ... I come back to get my keys ... That is when I see Markus telling katlin bout how I didn't want to stay and how I never drank and how Ashton asked katlin to prom and was lying to get back at me ... I was angry I walked out to see Ashton .... Sid and Nat . Hey Nat I go and hug her hey y didn't you lift my call ... I was worried you told your mom you were sleeping over at my place ... U idiot she wanted to talk to u ..Nat says Yeah I will call her later wait wat happen Nat asks nothing .... You know what hurts the most when someone says the love you just to take revenge on you for hurting there best friend more like rejecting them ... I din get it Nat reply's well the person who had to understood it .. Ashton . Garbed my keys from my hands .. Calm down Selena tell me wat happen .. I'dont want to talk to you .. Tell me he demands. .. Getting a tight grip on my hand . Ouch you hurting me I say .. He lets go I make a run for it .... I was at the park crying the whole night ... It's was 5 o clock I called Nat and asked her to tell my mom that I am going to school with her... Instead of going to school I went shopping ... I needed a make over .. I was not naive or stupid or dumb ..i just like to be nice to everyone and help everyone and believe that the world is a safe place ... After the letter. I realized it clearly isn't I don't get it. seriously. Ashton decide to make me feel bad and hurt me they way I did with dean so he said he loved me . But this didn't make any sense .. I was mad at every one .... I went home ... I was sad bout everything ... My parents were having a baby ... Didn't want them too .... Nat was avoiding me after the pic of me on the road with will ... Every one thought wrong bout me I was tired of everything ... I was drunk .. I wasn't sober the whole week ... I failed few class tests ... My friends forget that I even existed ... I was talking to Ashton I gave him the watch I bout him ... In lunch .. He was called to the lounge they din call me for some reason .... He left with the watch on the table .. I texted him .... He knew everything that happen I was sober after a while week I told Nat and val everything ..... The guys din want to look at my face ... I was kicked out of the basket ball team ...for playing the game drunk ... And my team didn't get to keep the trophy ... My parents found all the is out they were disappointed in me ... I broke their trust ... My mom begun to cry I was disappointed. In my self life was so annoying .... I didn't wnat to end it though I don't want to give up ever ... So I decided to change my self .... I retook all the tests... I played for the school base ball team and for the first time in 3 years we won the match .. I made a YouTube channel... I lost my self in reading books and making videos and .... Nat and val did talk to me but I was blocking them after they decided to leave me when I WAs going through shit ... And gave my number to a stranger just cause he said he likes me ... Ashton was angry cause he thought I was influenced by Markus and hated the fact that I did a blog with him ..... I blocked all the guys from the gang cause they called me names even after they knew the whole thing .... I didn't talk to my parents in a while ... They told me they had news ... I know your having a baby I say .. What no I just wanted to tell you that we love you no matter what. ....and we are having a weeding were every one will be invited and you will be the bridesmaid .. I wasn't excited ... Thad said he could postpone it ... Your already married it doesn't make a difference .. I say I walk u the stairs with out waiting even for a second ..... I went to my room to upload a vedio ... I was shocked to see all the comments and the dislikes that had come .... I delete my you tube channel . Cause since the last 3 days I tried to impress the you tubers and that didn't work out ... Nat was crying in one of the washroom stalls ... I was worried ... Hey Nat are you okay I ask pressing. My left year to the Door of the stall she was in .... She comes out and hugs me .... I missed you. Why did you leave me .. Hey Nat do you want to tell me what happen ... She told me that last week and the week before that she met a guy called sandy ...online . She liked him a lot ... She even gave him money ... For some shit lie he told her she loved him but he turned out to be be a drug dealer who would do anything for money ..even sell girls for his luxurious accommodations.. She was sad ... and on top of that she sent him a picture of her in a swim suit ... I asked her to stop crying we skipped class and we went to hack that guys account ... It's was essay to hack his account ... The hard part was deleted Nat images from all social media .. She was popular .. And I couldn't help but wonder how she was going to explain her self .. We finished ... Every thing we were supposed to do .. Hey lets skip physics to please .. No .. I know how you feel that but you have to be strong and face reality I say .. Okay I will but you should be strong and face my brother ... no i screamed which wasn't necessary. But i did .. Were argued for 15 mins... We were arguing are whole drive to school . I had to give in . We walked in to the class .. There was no one .. There was roseline who was taking a book out of the her bag .. Hey rosey I say she gave me a weird look wat she asked .. Can you tell me where everyone is ? There all in the amphitheater.. Nat asks wats going ... We are having are extra curricular activity partners decided ... What I have heard study buddies what in the moon is activity buddies .. Oh its is because the seniors bullied the juniors al lot to such an extent that 2 people tried to suicide.. They think this will help us .. So they think making friends with one person will help ... Rosey says know you will even get in a team .. 3 seniors and three juniors .. She rushed quickly saying Ashton hasn't picked anyone yet and she wants to be picked ... I walk along with rosey .. Ashton looks very angrily at me .. I was standing to one corner... Dean had already picked val or influenced the sir to pick her for him .. Ashton walks up to me hey what's your problem you made my sister also bunk class with you ... Did you also influence her puff some cigarettes. ... Mrs Kiran says you are here miss drew he is your partner okay .. I was okay with it he wanted and talked to miss drew for few minutes ... He came back and hands me a list of names of seniors few were ticked the others weren't ... He asked me to chose any guy ... From the list ... Hey Selena .. I hear Markus say .. Hey... Hi wat are you doing here I ask ... Iam here to announce the list of competitions my school is going to host ... Oh okay .. You should sign up ... I wish you could be with me he says .. We could totally beat everyone .. Any way who is your partner .. Uh right now I have ... Me Ashton interrupts ...mrs Kiran calls Markus .. He leaves .. After everything was done we all went for hotdogs . Ashton come to me and says thank you ... I ask for what for helping my sister with all that mess he says .. Oh you knew I asked in surprised manner .. Yeah .. I was just angry you trusted some one more than me ... Epically her .. And I didn't like you taking to Pearson and Markus . He says .. Oh okay .. Selena he says seriously. Can please. Not hang out with them they are bad influence ... I will try I say