Trying not to fall in love

all in my head

Dear  star ..

Well I do the know if forever exist.... or if ture love is actually true ... All I know is ... it was 5he fear of getting hurt the held me from exploring the world .. getting to know people ...  people are going to have there opinions about me ... I just need to stick to my opinion .... hope fully the right minded one .... but this dosent  , mean  that I don't have to be opened minded.... I just need to i have a balance to things
I pray to good hoping I will learn to balance my self .... we all want drama in out life's.... , maybe I do to .... I want to learn from the mess and grow stronger , smarter , and in total a better person than I was a day go or a Month ago .... I don't want to be dependent.... on some one all the time ... especially to encourage  me .... I just wish God helps me through all this mess ....

Ashtons p.o.v

Selenas parents owned a house  near the collage... surprisingly thad  graduated from harvard too ..so  thad had a penthouse which was 5 mins away from the collage.... so we were moving in to Thads place and Selenas parents place was beating renovated and give for lease ....

Crap this is heavy ash where do I put it she asks .... um I take it from here ... place it on the kitchen tabel .... after 3 hours of cleaning up .... and paranking each other and cleaning the mess again ... we were more than  exhausted.... the pizza had arrived ....
We ate like cave men ....

Around 11 : 30 .... I go to Selenas room  .... I couldn't sleep so ... Maybe I could look at her ... what... she wasn't there i walk in to the balcony she wasn't there either ... I satnd there  stating at the view ... she comes wrapping me up form the back and I felt something cold .... I turn around  .... ice cream she says shrugging her shoulder ....

You couldn't sleep to she asks ... no not really .. I reply .... she gets up .... hey were you going  to get an other spoon she says .... we can share .... I say ...

She sat on a long falt chair um like a beach chair but with cushions and all ... with her legs to the sides ... and  a sat really close to her ... we talked about our future ... and everything ....