Ti Amo da Lontano // Johnnyboy

Chapter Twenty One // Italiano

I opened my eyes, letting the bright sunlight disturb them. I immediately began to blink, feeling groggy.

Today was Monday, yet I had never felt so ambiguous and excited.

I slowly slipped out of bed, and opened the blinds a bit more. For a moment, I let my bare chest bask in the sun light.

I turned around, and walked to my dresser.

I pulled out a white t shirt, a black pair of jeans, and Johnny's denim jacket. He had let me borrow it, which made me ecstatic.

For a moment, just a second, I remembered that Johnny and I weren't dating.

We were still just friends.

I sighed, knowing that we'd never become a couple.

I was just a distraction until he got to know girls in Tulsa well enough so he could date them.

Shaking these thoughts from my mind, I began to get dressed.

I looked in the mirror, and fixed my hair with a bit of grease. Looking too greasy wasn't my look after I met Johnny.

Good ol' Johnny, I thought to myself.

I sighed to myself, feeling heart broken.

-

"Hey, Pony! Wait up!" I heard someone yell from behind me. I didn't need to turn around to know who it was.

"Pony!" they said, exasperated. I felt a hand on my shoulder, turning me around.

"Oh, hi Johnny. What's up?" I asked, casually. I didn't let any emotion show.

His face fell.

"I was just wondering why you didn't stop by this morning so we could walk together..." he mumbled, trailing off. I shrugged.

"Oh, I don't know. I guess I just didn't feel up to it," I replied.

The look on his face showed hurt. I felt bad, but I couldn't let my plan slip.

"Oh, well, will you walk me home today?" he questioned nervously. I shrugged my shoulders.

"Maybe, maybe not."

I walked away, leaving him to get engulfed in the hallway filling with students.

-

Two class periods later, it was my free period. I strolled down the halls, carrying my books in my hand. I felt like I was being watched. 

I glanced around, and noticed that Johnny was staring at me behind his locker door. He looked sheepish, almost helpless in the sense that he wasn't sure what to do. 

Suddenly, he closed his locker, and started walking towards me. 

I immediately turned around, and began to walk to my counselor's office, leaving him behind. 

-

"Ponyboy Curtis! What a pleasure. What can I do for you, doll?" asked Ms. Leslie. She was a nice young woman, who always seemed happy. I couldn't help but smile. 

"Well, I got a bit of a problem.." I began, trailing off. She gasped quietly. 

"Oh no! What might that be?" she questioned, knowing that I usually never came to her about any issues. Most of the time, I just dropped in to chat. 

"Well, Ms. Leslie, do you remember Jonathan Cade, the new immigrant from Italy?" I asked. She nodded her head. 

"That's the one with the tanned skin, and the sort of curly dark hair, right?" she replied. I nodded my head. 

"Yeah, that's him all right," I stated. She smiled slyly.

"Ain't that the one you got a crush on?" she teased. I felt my face burn bright red. 

Ms. Leslie just knew that I had a thing for Johnny.

"W- What? N- No! Of c- course not! Anyways.." I said, trying to divert her attention. 

"Well, recently, he's been feeling really insecure about the fact that he can't grasp the English language yet, and that he has an accent," I began. "It all started when one of my friends pointed it out to him."

"That's terrible, the poor boy! What do you want me to do about it?" she stated, determination in her voice. 

"You see, he's started to try and talk and act differently. He thinks he has to act like southerner trash to fit into this hell hole. He's trying to speak in a southern accent, and only speak bad English to fit in," I exclaimed. She furrowed her eyebrows. 

"I don't understand.." she whispered. "What's the plan?"

"Could you drop me from French class?" I asked, surprising her. 

"I suppose I could, why?" she replied, looking confused. 

I gave her a warm smile. 

"I've been ignoring him so he doesn't know of my master plan," I said, mysteriously. 

She blinked a few times, trying to catch my drift. 

"I want to take Italian instead, and make him feel like he belongs someplace."

She immediately got to work. 

-

I began walking home, when I felt someone tap on my shoulder. I smiled to myself, knowing who it was the minute they touched me. 

I turned around. 

"Jonathan Cade," I stated, looking him in the eye. I couldn't tell what he was feeling. "What can I do for you?" 

"P- Ponyboy, could I walk home with you?" he asked. He was trying to keep his Italian accent from coming through, but I could make it out slightly. 

I shrugged my shoulders. 

"If that's what you want, sure," I replied coolly, walking ahead. I felt him following me, until he was walking next to me. 

I felt his fingers touch my hand, and as much as I wanted to walk with our hands holding, I pulled mine away.

I shoved  it in my pocket instead. 

-

We were a few steps from my house, when Johnny began to talk. We had been silent the whole way. 

"Pony?" he questioned, sounding nervous. 

"Hm?" I replied, not looking at him. I could hear him gulp. 

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked. I wanted to nod, and scream that I loved him, but I stayed quiet. 

It wasn't only the fact that he was trying to change his personality, it was the fact that he was leading me on, too. He didn't really want me. If he did, we would've been dating. He would've been my boyfriend. 

None of that was going to happen. 

I bit my lip, and then gave him the slightest nod. 

I walked away from him, leaving him alone.