I had no idea as to what happened to my sister on that porch, but when I walked in that room I knew it was bad, she had on and oxygen mask and there was this tube going from this machine to inside her chest...we had been here for over 2 hours and they just now decided to let me and Chase in...Shawn had left, he wouldnt tell me where he went just that he was going to help her...
"You sure he should be here"
I asked Chase who was holding CJ, as I walked over to my sister's bed...
"I tried to leave him with one of my friends but he through a fit and said he wanted his mommy so I brought him along"
He said CJ on Beyonce's bed, he crawled up beside her and laid his head on her chest..He knew something wasnt right with his mom and probably wanted to know the same thing I did, what the hell was going on...
"Mommy sleeping"
He said looking at me but now lifting his head up...
"Yeah lil man mommys sleeping, but she'll be up soon"
I took a seat beside Chase, he reached up and wash olding her hand...
"You think whatever it is...its serious"
He asked me staring at her..
"She was in here not to long ago, but she never told me what was wrong with her, I knew it was serious then, but I didnt know how serious until now.....look at her..she looks so pale and helpless"
We just sat there staring at her...I guess we thought it we stared long enough she would wake up and be ok and then we could all go home and forget this whole sad ass scene..but I knew it wasnt going to happen like that..After about 15 minutes a doctor finally came in...
"Are you family of Ms.Knowles"
I stood up..
"Yeah, im here sister, whats wrong with her"
"Well your sister has what is called Cardiomyopathy, its a disease of the heart that weakens the blood vessels and causes the heart to stop working...."
"She's only 24, dont old white mean usually get that"
"Usually yes but its also very common in young people now too"
"Well what can you do to fix it"
"Right now, not much, in her its at its worse stage, her heart is slowly shutting down, which is causing the rest of her body to shut down, if we dont get her a heart within the next 4 to 5 days, im afraid she will go into whats known as congestive heart failure and...die"
"Oh my god"
I said immediately putting my hands up to cover my mouth as an instant reaction..
"Well what are you waiting for, get her a new hear then"
Chase said standing up..
"Its not that simple sir..we have Ms.Knowles on a list and nothing that matches has come in yet"
"So what are we suppose to do just sit around"
He said obviously aggitated
"Im afraid thats all we can do, is wait and pray something comes in soon enough"
I couldnt believe this..this was way to much for me to take in right now..The thought of loosing my little sister..was just something I could not fathom at the moment or any other moment..I went to sit down in the chair and put my head in my hands...I felt like I wanted to cry so bad but nothing would come out because my body was stopped up with emotions..I felt Chase place his hand on my shoulder...I looked up at him and placed my hand over his and then looked at Beyonce..
"Is she gonna wake up"
He asked looking at her aswell
"Eventually she will, but right now I think its best for her to be unconcious because when she finally does come to, she is going to be in a lot of pain"
His beeper started going off..He looked down and clicked it and then back at us..
"Im sorry..I have another patient..but if you have any more questions just have the Nurse at the Nurses Station to page me"
He turned and walked out the room...We were just left sitting there in utter disbelief..How could this happen..especially now..My sister has never in her life intentionally hurt anybody, she has a son who loves her to death, she just got Chase back, and now some fool ass doctor is trying to tell me that she going to die....its not fair..ill be damned if I let that happen...I gotta do something..I got up and went to walk out the room...
"Where are you going"
"I gotta fix this, i gotta find some way to help her"
"How"
He said getting up..
"I dont know...yet..but i gotta find out a way"
