All At Once (Completed) - Finding You Book 1

Harper

I feel amazing.

I'm lying on warm sand. The sun is bright, coloring my already tan skin. I close my eyes for a second, enjoying the moment. I love the beach, the ocean. The rush of the waves crashing on the shore reminds me of the night I finally let Camden in. He'd held me in this very spot the night after the jazz bar, and let me into his world. He's here now, shirtless and smiling on a big, soft beach blanket. He's talking about sand castles and seagulls, and other nonsensical things.

There's laughter and music that makes me want to dance. When I open my eyes, I'm staring into a pair of big, blue eyes. I melt when I hear the voice. It's soft and sweet. It's familiar.

"Can I build a sand castle, Mama?"

I sit up quickly. My heart is pounding. He knows me.

This small boy loves me; I see the trust and adoration in his eyes. He has short, messy black hair. My breath catches in my throat when I try to answer.

Mama.

Camden's eyes are bright as he leans over and places a soft kiss on my sun-kissed skin.

"What do you say, Mama?" Camden asks. His voice is deep and raw, and a shiver runs through me at the sound of it. He eyes me hungrily for a moment, but then his eyebrows bounce in place and a familiar, silly grin knocks his lips sideways. "Can we build a sand castle?"

A son. Our son.

"Mom," another voice calls. He's running toward me, kicking sand with every silly misstep. He dives face-first into the sand in front of me, and comes up giggling with a mouthful of sand. He spits and wipes his big, bright green eyes. His giggle, so heartbreakingly familiar, chokes me. He's no bigger than the last time I held him. It feels like no time has passed at all.

Then it hits me. I'm dead. I have to be. This boy in front of her with the messy chocolate hair and green eyes is alive and laughing with no pain and no blood. If I'm dead, I'm okay with it; if this is my heaven, I don't want to go back to earth. Everything I need is right in front of me.

"Cade, you want to build a castle, too?" Camden's voice is sweet and happy, as if it's completely normal that my son is alive and a part of our daily routine. "I bet we'll build the biggest, coolest castle on this beach. Don't you think, Mama?"

Tears spill from my eyes. My three boys are playing and happy...something I never thought I'd see.

"How the hell can a stupid little beach cart charge $4 for a soft pretzel?"

The voice is familiar, but lower than I've heard before. Chase. He's older than I remember. His hand slides over his stubble covered cheek and I smile.

Four boys. My four boys.

"Here's your iced tea," he says, handing it to me. It slips out of my hand, but I reach my left hand out to grab it before it hits the sand. My eyes catch on the huge, diamond ring on my left hand.

"Careful, Harper," Chase laughs. "If you thought the pretzel was expensive, you don't want to know how much your tea was. They charge an extra dollar for the raspberry flavoring!" He smiles. "Don't worry, you're worth it,"

I stay silent and smile as he leans back on his hands and looks up at the sky full of fluffy white clouds.

"Nice day. Glad I could make it," He says simply before pulling his Dodgers cap over his face and falling asleep.