Chapter 5 - Susan
I woke to the sound of a heart beating against my ear. I tilted my head up to see Sam still asleep. I gently pushed his arm away from my waist and walked over to the remains of the fire.
I suddenly remembered what had happened last night. He had told me that he loved me. I felt a wave of warmth pass through me. I had never felt like this before and he said he felt the same way. This can’t be happening. It must of been a dream.
“Morning beautiful.”
I turned to see Sam standing behind me. He pulled me into a hug and linked his hands together around my back. Ok, maybe it wasn’t a dream after all.
“Are you feeling alright? You look really pale” asked Sam.
“I feel fine” I lied. Inside I felt nervous and scared. I really liked him but was he actually a nice guy or was he faking it? I was so confused.
“Sit down” he ordered.
“I'm fine, really.” I could tell he could see right through my lies and sat down anyway.
He walked over to my clothes and picked them up. “These are dry now.” He came and sat next to me and dumped the clothes on my lap. “If you’re not feeling well you can just tell me you know.” Him keep on asking me if I felt ill just made me feel worse. What’s wrong with me? Why am I feeling like this?
I stood up, grabbed my clothes and walked behind the tree. I changed quickly into my clothes that actually fitted and threw him his shirt back. I took one last look at his muscles and then his shirt was covering them.
“We better get moving in case the other guys do come looking for us”
“Yeah” I mumbled. Then I realized why I was feeling sick. Sam was going to get killed. He didn’t believe he would, but I did. My heart ached and started pumping faster. I felt as though it was going to explode. I stood there for several minutes clenched over in pain. Sam stood meters away staring at me, not knowing what to do. Gradually my heart slowed down and was beating normally. Did I just have a heart attack? I felt confused about everything. I fell to the ground and started crying.
Sam rushed over to me and wrapped his arms around my back and swung me into his arms. He was cradling me like a baby. I felt so stupid. I tried to stop crying but I couldn’t and more tears fell from my eyes. I really had done more crying the last couple days than I had my whole life. Maybe being with Sam was a bad thing.
I managed to pull myself together and stop crying. I tried to say something caring, loving and romantic but instead I mumbled out “Your dead.”
“What?” he sounded confused. Ugh. Why didn’t I tell him I love him and we can’t be together.
“It’s just....Sam, I love you.”
“I love y-“ I cut him off and climbed out of his arms.
“But, we can’t be together. I’m not going to be selfish. I love you and I wish I could keep you, but this isn’t what’s meant to happen. You need to take me to Zalagon. Take me to him and move on with your life. If you take me to him then at least you can live a good life. If we runaway together you’ll end up getting shot anyway and then I will be taken to Zalagon then and both our lives would be ruined.” I tried to stay strong. I could see tears well in his eyes. He didn’t bother to wipe them away which made it even harder to continue. “I love you Sam and I always will, but taking me to Zalagon is the only way.”
“Susan don’t even think about that. You really think I'm going to give you up like that?” Tears were pouring from his eyes. “I will never leave you. You’re not the one being selfish. It’s me. I'm keeping you all to myself.”
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