It's Not Over

Chapter 14

Amanda's POV

I was with Marcello when I realized who the voices belonged to. They belonged to my co workers. Nick, Fin, Liv it was their voices, but where were they coming from. I listened close to make out words but they were all jumbled. I could make out my name being used but I also heard other words. Finally a word really stuck out. Coma. I wasn't dead, I was in a coma.
Right than the world went dark again. I pinched myself trying to wake up with no success.
"Come on either wake up or die" I said to myself.
I had to focus, follow the voices. I did then suddenly it was no longer dark. In fact it was bright as hell, blinding almost.
I was awake at last. I took me a second to adjust to the bright hospital lights and to realize my right eye was swollen shut. I saw everyone across the room talking to each other not yet noticing I was awake. I tried to speak, but there were tubes in my mouth. At last Nick noticed I was awake.
"You're awake" he said and everyone else turned around.
"thank god, we thought we were gonna lose you" said I'm assuming was a nurse.
Liv came over to me and informed me that Marcello and his men were caught and locked up.
After them explaining what was wrong with me I was told to get some sleep. I wanted to sleep. I was so tired, but at the same time I was scared to. I didn't want to relive any of what happened again.
Eventually exhaustion got the best of me and I drifted into a fitful sleep.

Nick's POV

"We'll be heading back to New York tomorrow morning" Liv told me back at the hotel. "You'll be alright staying here right?"
"Yeah of course"
"Nick is something bothering you?"
"No." I lied.
"Seriously what's going on?"
"Nothing, I mean the last month and a half haven't been very fun in case you forgot."
"I get that, but there's something else bothering you."
"Okay fine. Marcello spoke to me. I figured he was gonna like torture me or something, but we just talked."
"Why's that bothering you?"
"It's what they said. They knew things I never told anyone, not even you."
"Like what?"
"Don't you think if I wanted you to know I would've told you."
I didn't mean to sound snappy, it just kinda came out that way. On the bright side she dropped the subject.
"I'll see you in the morning" she said and left the room.
I wasn't going to be able to sleep tonight. Not after being reminded of what they said.

Amanda's POV

The next morning I woke from a restless sleep and got the tubes taken out of my throat.
"How'd you sleep" Liv asked when they got here.
"I didn't really. Just kept waking up."
"I'm sorry" Liv said.
I just sighed.
"Fin and I are leaving today for New York. Nick's staying here with you."
"Lucky you" Nick laughed.
"We should get going. Got a long ride ahead of us"
With that Fin and Liv said their goodbyes and left.

"I'm not going to push you to tell me anything, but I don't want you to bottle everything up until you can take it. You need to talk to someone."
We had been sitting there for almost an hour before anyone said anything.
"I want to cry, scream, but I just can't. I'm too tired."
I had given up trying to lie. He'd been there with me he'd know if I were lying.
"Sleep, you need to sleep." He said.
"I with I could. Every time I close my eyes I see his face. His, Caleb's Jeff, every guy that ever tormented me."
"I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere. No one can hurt you, not anymore."
"You can't be there in my nightmares"

I tried staying awake, but failed. Soon I was dreaming.

Nick's POV

She appeared to be sound asleep so I decided to drift off. The moment I just started snoozing she was screaming. The nurses came rushing in.
"It's fine it's fine just a night terror." I explained to them.
I got her to wake up and she grabbed hold of me.
"It was just a dream, you're safe."
I stroked her hair until she calmed down enough to lay down.
"Do you know how Apollos doing" she asked.
"Liv said K9 offered to take care of him while we're gone. He should be fine."
"Good, good. How are you doing?" She asked out of no where.
"Fine, it's you I'm worried about. I want to know what's going on in that head of yours."
"Trust me you don't"
We sat quiet for a minute.
"I don't get it." She finally said. "Why are you here? Why did you bother getting involved with me and Jeff to go begin with?"
I had to think. The truth was after what happened with my dad growing up I couldn't stand abusers. Those kind of people are just someone I can never show mercy for. Plus I really cared about Amanda. Not necessarily in a romantic way, but in general I didn't want to see her hurt.
"Why wouldn't I?" Was all I could think to say.
"I mean I haven't always been the most honest or nicest, or smartest person. I guess I just don't see why anyone would want to put up with me or care."
"That's Jeff talking" I said. "He wanted you to think no one cared when in reality we all do. Even Cragen got in contact with Liv when he heard what happened."
"Sometimes I wonder if Jeff was right. If maybe I do just exist to please."
She wasn't talking to me, she was talking to herself. Still I answered her.
"That's not true"
"Let's face it, I'm the least of all of us. You, Liv, Fin. Maybe leaving Atlanta was a mistake all together. Maybe I just should've learned to keep my mouth shut."