my life is so dull. there are so many thing i want to do but can't; either because i'm too much of a coward to do it or i lack the financial support because i'm too young to work (and honestly a little scared of getting my first job) and it sucks. i have no super cool stories like some of my friends do because i always play it safe and stop before it gets fun/ i could get in trouble. i just don't know how to add some action into my freaking life. i'm literally scared of everything, no joke. i have so many stupid irrational fears that could never (well like 1% chance) happen and i worry over them! i need to get over myself and buck up because this sucks and every day like this i feel like i push people away more and hate myself more. i think i should just start doing crazy things like jumping into a lake of a bridge or going up to a stranger and say hello or go to a party and stop being so damn tense. i don't know if this is anxiety or just me being a buzzkill.
