Finding, and Losing Love- Patrick Kane fanfic

Chapter 41

                *Patrick's P.O.V.*

I open the door, and immediately flop onto the couch. I feel empty. I feel like nothing.

"You feeling alright?" Alex perches on top of Jon's lap, and i feel like gagging. Don't they know i can't stand PDA especially when Lyla's gone?

"No i don't." I snap.

"Hey." Jonathan's tone is warning.

Alex looks at Jonny, and mouths "it's okay."

But it's not. Nothing's okay.

"Just let me be alone." It takes so much strength to pick myself off of the couch, but i force my feet to move.

I slam the door behind me, and i let my legs move. I don't know where they're taking me, but i go on. It starts to rain, and i yell out of frustration.

I don't even know where I am.

"Arrghh!" I scream out into the open air. 

I lie down, and i feel rainwater from the grass soak my back. Then, i see the flowers.

The same flowers i weaved into Lyla's hair. I've been here before.

It's the park.

It's the park, except it doesn't feel like it. There's no laughter, no sunshine. There's no children, no parents, no balloons, and no ice cream. There's no Lyla.

It's cold, the water seeping into my clothes. I don't care. The cold feels good against my skin, and it feels as though I'm the only one left in this universe.

I laugh a cold, bitter laugh, and end up coughing. I sneeze, and i finally feel the presence of the cold rain. I shiver, but don't move.

Maybe i can just lie here forever.

I feel hazy, and my eyes start to droop

A car enters the park, and it honks. I ignore it, as i feel my energy being robbed away from me.

It honks again, and i lift my head up reluctantly.

It's Jonathan.

"Pat, get in here!" He yells out his open window.

I close my eyes again, as he drives over.

"You're going to be sick out here in the rain. It's cold too." He looks down at me disapprovingly.

"Fuck off, Jonny. I don't need your captain serious act right now." I say annoyed.

He looks at me surprised, then gets out of the car.

"No." He says.

"Excuse me?" I ask, my turn to be surprised.

"I said no. Get in the car and quit whining." He says.

His words are so commanding, i do.

The pain in my chest doesn't go away. Instead, i have a headache too. I sniffle, and i know that I'm getting sick.

Jonny drives me home -- in silence.

Once i open the door, I see Alex pacing around nervously.

"Pat!" She sounds relieved, and she wraps me in a towel. It's then that i realize I'm shivering and my teeth are chattering.

"Put him to bed. His lips are blue." Jonathan says quietly.

I shouldn't of yelled at him,  and i know.

Alex nods, and follows me to my room. I sniffle, and my headache seems worse. I strip off my clothes and change into my pajamas. Alex makes the bed for me, and gives me a pill. I down the pill without question, and i begin to fall asleep.

I'm asleep very lightly, but i can hear speaking.

"He's sick, he won't be able to make the game tomorrow."

A long pause.

"I understand. I can be the judge of that, he's not well."

Another pause, but this time quicker.

"Yes. I will have a chat with him. Thank you, Q."

And the talking stops.

I open my eyes, awake now. I want to thank Jonny, but i dont know how to do it. I was a jerk. I always act that way when frustrated or when I'm upset. I feel like crap. I don't feel like moving, i just feel like staying in this bed until she comes back.

She. My love. My first love, and maybe my only because i don't think I'll ever be able to love anyone this much.

Sweet Lyles, i miss her so much.

I want to see her hair.

I want to touch her face.

I want to kiss her lips.

I want everything.

I'm so selfish. I know she's enduring so much pain in Ireland, but I'm also feeling the pain. My heart feels dead, and i shake my head.

"Goodnight, Lyla. I miss you. I love you." I whisper my words into the night, thinking she can somehow hear me.

Somehow.