Hatefire © *COMPLETED*

Chapter 20

Emily's POV

"I'm sorry?" "You really think that jumping off of the balcony would make all of these problems go away?  Do you know what you dying would do to people?" "I wasn't planning on dying." "Yeah, well it would have happened.  Niall would be ripped to shreds forever thinking it was his fault for bringing you, your family would have lost you forever, it would kill Gemma inside to think if only she had held onto you tonight in her sleep or if only she hadn't spent so much time with Ashton.  Louise would lose a best friend and a best student, everyone else would be heartbroken and I don't even want to begin on what it would do to me, I don't even want to know.  Why would you even consider jumping?! That's absolutely ridiculous!" "Maybe because my head feels like it's going to explode and I just need some relief." "Take an advil, don't jump off of a balcony!" He was pacing back and forth while yelling this whole thing at me. "Harry, I'm sorry.  I'm sorry, I scared you, I didn't want to hurt anyone, I wasn't thinking straight." "I can tell..." He came and sat on the ottoman across from me so that our knees were touching. "I just don't know what would have happened if I wasn't as quick or if I hadn't woken up." "Harry, you don't have to worry about me or defend me, I'm fine on my own." "No you're not, not after what just happened." "I'm just stressed out right now and I've been trying to come up with what to say to you for days now." "What do you mean?" "As a response to what you said on the bus." "Oh... Right." I was quiet for a minute and then touched his hand. "Harry, I'm going home.  Back to Ireland.  I leave next week."

He looked up at me with wide eyes. "So that's it, you're just going to leave? After everything?" "Harry, I can't be that normal thing in your life anymore, not after what you told me." "And how do you feel?" "I don't know, that's why my head is so foggy right now.  I don't know how I am supposed to feel or what I am supposed to feel and it's driving me insane, I just want answers." "You already know mine.  That's as much as I can give you.  But you're going to leave your brother?" "Yes." He stood up and walked towards the balcony and opened the curtain so we could see out. "You know, I saved you for a reason." "I don't need you to save me or keep defending me Harry, I'm fine." I stood up and walked to the other end of the room and leaned against the wall. "I just think it would be better if we both took some time apart so we can figure everything out because this isn't going to happen between us.  I can't." "What do you mean Emily?" "I mean that it can't happen.  As long as you want something normal in your life, we can't feel like this for eachother." "So the feeling between us is mutual?" "I never said that." He sat down in front of the sliding door and pulled his knees up. "Well, when you figure it out, let me know.  But until then, I'm staying here so you don't get the stupid idea to jump again." I walked back into my shared room and got into bed with Gemma, who instantly clung to me.  I just needed to leave, I needed to go home. 

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PS Sorry about all the cliffhangers it's just the way I wrote the book :)