Just go with it! [Book 1]

What to think

I wake up with a sore neck from falling asleep on the couch. I pen my eyes and just stare at the sun beams coming through the window. I know Kayden had probably called and texted me all night, I always answer or respond, I know he's worried. I don't know what to say to him, I know I should at least respond but I can't. I know I'm being a coward, I just can't bring myself to even check my phone. I plan on just laying on the couch the rest of the weekend and pretending nobody else exists. I hope ma doesn't give me a hard time.

I wonder how far along I am. We're almost into April so probably almost 3 months i'd guess. I still can't believe I'm going to have a baby, I'm going to be a mom. My eyes start to fill with unshed tears. I can't believe I'm going to have a baby! This is crazy, I get when you have sex a baby happens but I just thought I'd be a mom in my mid twenties not at eighteen. Ma walks into the living room with some orange juice for me. "Good Morning Honey, How did you sleep?" She ask gently. " I slept really hard, my neck hurts from the stupid couch and I wanna hide forever!" I say as I let the tears start to fall. She pulls me into a hug "I know it's a lot to take in right now Jessabell, just let's take it day by day. We can go to the Dr Monday and go from there, I'll be with you the entire time." She says with a smile. "Do you remember your last period?" Ma asks. I don't really remember to be honest I haven't been paying attention." I think some time in december, I'm not really sure to be honest." I say kind of embarrassed. "Okay well before Monday let's try and get a better idea they will ask." She says before getting up and walking towards the kitchen. "I'll help with breakfast, I'm just going to take a quick shower!" I shout to ma before heading to my room.

The shower feels amazing! I just wanna wash off all the anxiety and worry I'm having. As if it was that easy. Ma works with baby's all the time so at least that's one less thing to worry about. I rub my stomach in circles, it's still flat I'm just a little bloated. I can't imagine how big it's going to get, Its going to look like a basketball is under my shirt when I start to show. I can't help but smile a little thinking there's a little human that's a mixture of me and Kayden. If only I could stay in the shower and not face the reality of everything, good and bad.

I walk down the hall following the amazing aroma from everything ma is cooking. She's already finished making everything, I guess I stayed in the shower longer then I expected. "Thanks ma, I'm sorry I didn't get to help." I say. "It's okay honey, I don't mind." She says putting a plate down in front of me. I hope I can keep all this down if looks and smells amazing. She joins me sitting across from me. We don't say much as we start eating. I love how she's been nothing but supportive, I couldn't imagine if she wasnt. " Thank you so much ma for everything" I say with a smile. She smiles back with tears in her eyes. These hormones are gonna get the best of me I can tell! We finish up breakfast and I take out plates the sink. I guess I can clean up sense ma cooked.

I feel a bit queasy but I'm gonna try to keep everything down. I hate throwing up so much, not that anyone likes it. It just sucks! I open the back window to let some fresh air in, hopefully distract me from getting sick haha. Ma come back into the kitchen "I went online and set your Dr appointment for 8:00 am Monday morning. They're probably not gonna do much this first appointment so don't get to anxious about it." She says looking on her phone. "Okay ma thank you, I'm still nervous." I say with a little laugh.

Knock knock knock

Ma and I just look at each other we aren't expecting anyone today. "I'll answer it honey." She says walking to the front door. I can't see who it is because she just barely cracked it. "Is Jessabell here I haven't been able to get a hold of her" I hear a worried voice that I could recognize anywhere it's Kayden. Fuck! Best an worst part about living so close to your boyfriend. I didn't think about him just coming over. I feel like a deer in a head lights stuck watching to see what ma's going to do. "Hey Kayden, yeah she's here and wasn't feeling well last night. Come on in sweety." She says opening the door to let him in. what the fuck ma, Now I really feel like I'm going to throw up!

I know it's short I'm sorry the next one will be longer! Don't forget to like and comment <3