So darling, just you shut your pretty mouth [jalex]

Maybe you'll stop me from digging my own fucking grave

Neck deep head to the ground

Maybe you'll stop me from digging my own fucking grave

I don't like waiting rooms. I don't like the dirty blue couches that sink down too far making it hard for you to get up. I don't like the whispered conversations. I don't like the bubbly pop music playing on the radio that sits on the table in a corner. I don't like that table, theirs no particular reason other than it's ugly and in a waiting room. I don't like the untouched magazines on the table and I don't like how Jack was squeezing my thigh telling me it's fine. It's not fine. I'm going to fucking therapy. I don't need it and I'm just taking up time that someone who really wants and needs the help I'm so lucky to be receiving.

I don't hate everything about waiting rooms. To be quite honest I find the people in them quite interesting. We was all here for the same reason, either they or someone they know has shit mental health. You can tell who are the worried parents and who actually wants help. Theirs people like me who sit nervously on their phones, eyes darting up to the door every time someone walks in or out. Theirs children as young as ten in the waiting room. No child so young deserves to be in therapy. Theirs a few adults who assume to be alone but it's mostly teenagers with theirs parents. Fucked up kids. All of us having our story, I'm sure even a lot of the people that are only here for support have a story to tell. Just like Jack.

"Alex Gaskarth." I look up and see Charlotte, the same blonde lady I met two weeks ago.

"Come on Alex." Jack stood up pulling me up with him, I nervously follow holding Jack's hand.

"Do you want your boyfriend to sit in the session?" Charlotte asked as we walked down the corridor.

"Yes." I mutter hardly able to speak, "He stays."

"Okay." Jack squeezes my hand tighter, "We're in room five today."

I offer no response. What was their to say? Saying okay would achieve nothing so I'm not going to say anything. I don't give a single fuck what room we are in when I don't even want to be here. If it was up to me I would be at home with Jack making out on my bed and maybe going further. When Charlotte opened the door to room five I was greeted with a horrible lime green coloured walls. Why they wanted green I don't know. The chairs where a leather brown colour and their was a table in the middle of them. Under the table a clear plastic box was filled with kids toys. Me and Jack sat down on the couch and Charlotte sat on the single chair. Jack doesn't let go of my hand.

"So what have you done this week?" She asked getting a notebook out and starting off the session.

"I was sick." I shrug, "And I got high."

"On what?"

"Weed."

"Is that all the drugs you do?" She writes down on her notepad.

"Yeah."

"Do you smoke with him Jack?" I knew she could tell that I wasn't interested in talking to her.

"No." Jack said politely.

"Kiss ass."

"He was with our friend Zack and his friends Vic and Kellin." Jack ignored me, "I was actually surprised he did?"

"Why's that?"

"Because he hates everyone outside our friendship group. He hated me at first" I snuggle up into Jack's shoulder, I just want to go home.

"Why's that Alex?"

"Don't want to talk about it." I dismiss her.

"That's fine." She scribbles something down on paper, "Is their anything else you would like to tell me? Maybe something you're worried about?"

"Nope?"

"What about you Jack?"

"Erm." Jack looks me in the eye before deciding that he's going to say what's on his mind, "He hasn't been eating properly and he's been lying about eating so I didn't worry."

"I just haven't been hungry." I don't want this therapist getting any ideas, "Or nothing has been appealing so I won't eat it."

"Okay." Her manicured nails tap on the notepad, "Would you like to talk about that?"

"What's to talk about?" I ask.

~~

"See that wasn't that bad." Jack said after we left, that's a lie it was awful, I never want to go back again.

"I only have five more sessions left until I'm quitting." Theirs no point in lying to Jack, I hate it and I want him to know, now I'm just pissed off and upset.

"It's alright kitten." Jack kissed my cheek, "We're going home now."

"Can we go yours?" I ask, "My mum would want to know how it went and right now I just want to spend time with you."

"Of course." Jack smiles, "My parents are going out for dinner tonight so we have the house alone."

"I love you so much." I smile as we get into the car, "I love everything about you so fucking much."

Jack looked like he was glowing with happiness as we drove back to his. I look away from him for a second to say I'm staying round Jack's and that I'll see her tomorrow before looking back at Jack. He was focusing on the road but he kept sneaking glances at me.

"Are your parents going to be their when we get in?" I ask.

"Probably not." Jack said, "Why?"

"Just asking." I grin and Jack looks at me grinning.

"If you wanna fuck you can just say." I bite the inside of my lip, "It's so cute when you get embarrassed."

"Shut up." I muttered, "Its unfair."

"It's only because you're a virgin." Jack shrugged, "You're going to get more confident soon I promise."

"You're just embarrassing me more."

"Sorry kitten." He laughed, "But I love how cute you look when you blush."

"I don't."

"But you look happy and I love seeing you happy." Jack pulled up outside his house, "Are you going to admit you're a bottom before we go in?"

"For the sake of my own pride I'm going to say no."

"But really you are."

"We will see." Jack probably knows I'm going to admit it eventually so he just laughed.

Authors note

I'm not sure if people got the notification for yesterday's chapter so check that out.

I really regret not saving therapy for this chapter because I couldn't think of a better song to fit. Theirs a few songs I'm saving for the end but I struggle to find songs sometimes even though I know theirs plenty.

So questions. Do you think Alex is going to quit at therapy as soon as his sixth session is over? Alex's life seems pretty good right now do you think somethings going to go wrong soon?

Hugs, kisses and peace ✌🏻