Life Long Letters - a Matthew Espinosa Fanfiction

Chapter 15

I joined Katherine, Julie, Connor and Shawn home. Shawn wasn't angry at me anymore, lucky was that. Connor and Katherine were walking hand in hand.

"It was about time." I spoke and nodded towards their entwined fingers. Katherine laughed and so did Con.

"We all saw it coming though... I mean, there were never Connor... and Cathy. It's always been Connor and Cathy." Julie said and turned around to face us. Shawn and herself was walking a few steps in front of us. We all laughed and joked on our way to their place. As we walked around the corner, we saw Matt's. Julie looked at me questionably and so did Shawn.

"What's he doing here?" Shawn asked annoyed and observed the car.

"I don't know..." I said slowly and walked over to his car.

"We'll give you guys some privacy." Katherine said and pulled Shawn inside. Connor and Julie followed by themself. I walked over to the driver's seat and found Matt staring straight forward. I knocked on the window gently to let him know I was there. He drowsily looked at me and as he saw who I was; tears started to form in his eyes. I opened the door quickly and embraced him in a hug.

"He's gone, Y/N... He's gone." He breathed out and the tears landed on my shoulder. I caressed his back and even though I knew what he was talking about... I didn't want to believe it because I couldn't handle him this sad.

I ended up driving him to the hospital. He was more calm now, but he refused to let go of my hand.

"Do you want to go in?" I asked him quietly and squeezed his hand. He was just staring out the window.

"I need to see my mom." He tried to spoke but his voice cracked at 'see'. I nodded and got out of the car then ran to the other side. As soon as he got out I gave him a hug. He didn't really hug back... Just let his arms hang down along his sides. I kissed his arm before hooking mine in it. We walked slowly towards the entre due to the fact his legs were like spaghetti. We took the elevator. Didn't speak to each other on the whole way. I felt like we didn't need to. He was devastated. I understood that.

As the elevator opened at the 4th floor, the first person we saw was his mother. She was sitting in the type of position where you hug your legs. Just like her son, she was just staring. Dry tears was visible on her cheek. If I could guess, there had been a lot of screaming and denial. As she spotted us, she stood up and new fresh tears formed. Matt walked up to her and squeezed her tight.

"He's really gone." I heard Matt's shaky voice say in-between his sobs. His mom stroke his hair and then grabbed Matt's face between her hands.

"Listen to me Matt." She said. He looked away. "Matt!" she said and made him look at her. "We'll be okay." She took him in her arms and held him for a while.

I sat in the cafeteria the rest of the evening. It was for the best if I just kept my distance and let the family deal with this on their own. I read the same magazines over, and over again. As I was, uninterested, looking though Elle for the 10th time, someone joined me by my table. I looked up and saw Matt's tired face. I put the magazine on the table and reached over for his hand.

"How are you feeling?" I said quietly.

"Like I just got stabbed in the heart multiple times." He said cold. "They want me to go see him one last time." He said and looked at a couple of kids playing in a corner. "I can't go alone, Y/N." I looked at him and asked if he wanted me to come with me. He nodded.

He looked so peaceful. Like he was asleep and would wake up in any second now. It made me wonder... What happens when you die? Do you go into some kind of twisted or wonderful dream? Maybe the dreams are like heaven and hell. If you've been good, you dream of all the things that makes you happy but if you've been bad, you dream about all your worst nightmares. I could tell just by looking at him... he'd lived a good life, surrounded by people who love him and people he loved. I'd never met the kid, but he reminded me of Matt. The way his cheekbones connected to his jaw. The way his eyelids were completely still as he had the closed.

Matt stayed with his brother for the rest of the night. He even told me a few story's and memories they shared. I never interrupted him. Mostly because I was amazed by the way his eyes lit up as he spoke about his brother. I liked the spark too much to let it disappear.