Life Long Letters - a Matthew Espinosa Fanfiction

Chapter 22

He’s gonna be just as tone deaf as Nash and Cameron and it’s gonna be so awkward. Please God, save him from this embarrassment. And God must have heard my prayers, because damn, Matt actually, like for real, sung. He even rapped the parts of Collide. I didn’t even know that was possible from his little mouth.

After the show I met Matt backstage.

“Do you have any other hidden talent you’d like to share?” I asked and laughed.

“Well…” he said and then burped right in my face. “…There’s one.” He said and laughed.

“That wasn’t so well hidden because I’ve heard it before.” I said and laughed. “But for real, Matt, I didn’t know you could sing.”

“Well, today was the first time I’ve sung in front of anyone, so you’re not the only one.” He said and sat down in one of the couches.

“Are you serious?” I asked and he nodded. “Wow. That must have been so scary… Singing for the first time I mean.”

“Not really. When you decide to fully commit to something, you don’t let the chance slip away.” He said and patted the seat next to him for me to sit on. I sat down next to him.

“Well, you were really, really good.” I told him.

“To be honest, I couldn’t have done it if it weren’t for you.” He said and stroke my hair, as I put my head on his shoulder.

“God, I love you.” I said and realized what I just said. I’d never said the L-word to Matt before. What if he freaks out? I totally just messed it all up didn’t I? Damn it. Damn it. Damn it.

“I love you too.” He replied quickly while I was mentally slapping myself. And those small words. Those four small words, filled with so much meaning, made me feel of such worth. I’ve never ever, felt the way I feel about Matt. He bend down and kissed me on the lips and in that moment, I realized, I didn’t know what had happened between him and Belle. I didn’t know if whatever happened between them, would happen between us. I didn’t  know anything. For God’s sake, I barely even know who I am.

During our kiss, Hayes comes around the corner from the stage. We end the kiss and I jumped a seat further from Matt. He looked at me with smirk on his face and then smiled. I smiled back. I don’t know what the hell was wrong with me. I’d just told him I love him and he’d say the same back, and I still felt this way. I felt like I was just on the rollercoaster of life and then all of a sudden it went underground and we couldn’t get back up. At least not for now. I love him. I really do, and I’m glad I can finally get it out there. But there’s still that little voice in the back of my head, saying; “But what about Belle, Y/N? What was it he did that was so horrible? It will happen to you, and you know it. Belle may have been the first, but sure as hell not the last.” I snapped out of my thoughts when Hayes started talking.

“We’re grabbing something to eat. Wanna come?” I looked at Matt and he looked at me.

“Yeah, sure man.” Matt said and smiled. He took my hand and helped me up. Such an innocent guy with a heart of gold. But what if that’s just a disguise?

We went to Taco Bell for dinner. Apparently this was a pretty common thing for the boys. We were split, since there was so many of us. Matt ended up at the other table with Aaron, Hayes, Cameron and Jack J, while I sat down next to Mahogany. I looked around and saw Jack G, Nash and Taylor.

“So, Y/N, right?” Mahogany asked and took a bite of her food.

“Yeah.” I said and swallowed.

“Matt told us so much about you!” she started and I was worried he’d told them something embarrassing. “He said you and I would be like the bestest of friends!” she laughed.

“Yeah, and you know what? You can start being my best friend tonight, because I really need to buy me some new pants.” I said and laughed. Mahogany laughed and looked at me questionably. “I forgot pants.” I told her.

“Ohh… Well if you need anything, I’m at my hotel room basically all the time.” She said and smiled. “And then tomorrow you and I are going shopping, okay?” I smiled and nodded a yes.

Mahogany and I talked a lot during the ‘dinner’ and actually came pretty close. Of course I talked to Jack, Nash and Taylor, too, but just if there was something in their convo’s which made me laugh or dragged me in.