All I Ever Wanted

Chapter Eight

I met Mike a week ago. Things have been normal, well normal for me anyway. I visited my grandmother, brought food and started planning Phoebes and my own education. I'm home schooled by my mother but usually she forgets so I just get on with things by myself. This September Phoebe has to start school too. The problem is Phoebe doesn't want to be home schooled. She wants to go to primary school.

The reason I'm home schooled is I wouldn't be able to look after Phoebe if I was at school. Also it would be harder to keep our secret. If someone found out we would no doubt be put into the care system. Then we would be separated for a greater chance of adoption. I couldn't lose Phoebe, yet I was reluctant to say no to her request. She should be able to do something as simple as go to school. Currently it is nearing the end of August so I have a few weeks before she starts school. In my opinion it isn't that long.

Today we're visiting our grandmother. It's likely we'll run into Mike again, he seems to be there a lot but won't tell us why. So I no longer ask. I brush the last of the knots out of my curly hair and place the brush neatly on the dresser.

Phoebe starts to stir and she sits up sleepily. I smile, "Hey sleeping beauty." I take her brush and sit on the bed behind Phoebe. I gently comb through her hair.

She asks excitedly, "What are we doing today?"

I smile at her eagerness. "Visiting Grandmother." I say running the brush through her curls. She takes the brush off me, "Hurry up then!" Phoebe complains. If you haven't guessed she likes visiting our Grandmother. She finishes brushing her hair herself and begins searching for something to wear.

I leave her to it. She doesn't seem to need or want my help. I go to find mother. I find her in her room holding her head. I whisper, "We're going to visit Grandmother."

I say it just loud enough to be heard but still she yells at me, "Shut up!" Then she winces and mutters "Inconsiderate girl." under her breath. I'm the inconsiderate one? I don't apologise knowing It will bring on another wave of insults. Instead I creep away.

Twenty minutes later we're sitting in bedside chairs listening to my grandmother complaints. "The food tastes like dog shi-" I put my hand across my grandmothers mouth.

I stare at her horrified. Who knew old ladies swore? "Phoebe is right there!" I complain.

Sheepishly she says, slightly breathless "Sorry." She stays silent for a moment trying to catch her breath. When she does she mutters furiously, "Old age is the worst." Waving her hand in distaste she asks me, "When does Phoebe start school?"

I frown. Our grandmother should be so eager about it. Is she that willing to put our secret in danger? But then I remember, she doesn't know, only suspects. My frown loosens and I shrug. "Mother isn't sure."

She nods accidentally knocking her hand lightly on the bedside cabinet. "Ouch!" That's going to leave a bruise." She yells gasping for breath. Everyone giggles. "Anyway, you should let her go to school. The girl can make some friends."

I look at Phoebe. Our grandmother had said the exact right thing. I'm always worried Phoebes not going to make many, or any, friends. I lean down and whisper in Phoebes ear, "When do you want to buy uniform?"

She looks up at me excitedly. "REALLY?" She shouts. I nod my head solemnly trying not to laugh, she's just too cute. She drags me away and calls behind us, "Sorry we have to leave!" I let myself be dragged through swarms of people.

I tap her shoulder and she spins round. "What?" She asks impatiently.

"We need to go get some money Pheebs."

She scowls. "Fine! And don't call me Pheebs!" She protests. She funny when she's mad. She's like a little kitten.

I hear a voice behind us, it's Mike. Probably he's come to annoy us. "What do you want?" I snap turning around.

He holds his hands in the air, "I come in peace!" He jokes. I roll my eyes. I'll believe that when I see it. My thoughts seem to be written across my face because he says, "Okay, you're right I came to annoy the heck out of you." I sigh resigned to my fate and I walk home.

Phoebe happy to spread the news tells him, "I'mgoingtoschool!" In her rush her words get jumbled into one word.

Mike frowns. "No idea what you just said. At all." He comments.

"I'm. Going. To. School." She makes an effort to spread out the words so he can understand her.

Mikes frown deepens and he says, "That's not cool. School sucks." Phoebes face falls. I glare pointedly at Mike. Gulping he backtracks, "Not really. Just joking..." He trails off anxiously looking at me. It's hilarious how he's so scared of me.

We reach the house and I order Mike to wait outside. I take Phoebe inside with me and walk silently up the stairs. I grab some notes from my piggy bank, tuck them in my pocket and rush back down the stairs. In horror I stop as I see Mike at the bottom of the stairs, at the same time I hear my mother stir from her bed. I hear the clink of a bottle and know she's been drinking something stronger than water.

My life is over.

I tell Mike calmly "Go, outside." I sound a lot calmer than I feel. I hear footsteps from inside my mother's room. My heartbeat quickens in fear. I walk quickly down the stairs. "Let's go!" I say urgently. The footsteps become louder and Mike must hear them too.

Mike smiles at my obvious discomfort. "What happened to all the photos?" Panicking I shove him out of the door just as my mother steps into the hall. That was closer than I cared to admit.

I drag Mike away and think of the answer to his question. The real answer is mother smashed most of them. A few favourites we took down to keep safe. Only a few remain. But of course I'm not going to answer his question. At least not truthfully.

Phoebes happy mood is still in place. I admire how she can still be smiling so vibrantly when everything nearly spiralled out of control. It amazes me how she can be so vulnerable yet her optimism would make you think otherwise.

I turn my attention to Mike who is uncomfortably answering her questions about school. He's lying through his teeth to make school seem good. I'm guessing he didn't have a great time in school. He's dying to tell Phoebe not to go to school but I just shoot him harsh glares. Phoebe can make up her own mind about school.

When we reach the uniform shop Phoebe runs ahead. My eyes widen in alarm as she runs across the road without looking. I check the road and see a car closing in. Stupid, stupid girl! Except I'm not talking about Phoebe, I'm talking about myself. I should have foresaw this.

My heart is in my mouth as the car breaks.

Then I realize the car won't stop in time.

Then I look at Phoebe, who is frozen in shock.

The car is going to hit her. I run into the road. Horns honk and tires screech but Phoebe is close enough to touch. I shove her across the road and out of harms way. I continue to run but I'm a second too late.

The car hits my leg and I'm thrown across the road. My head collides with solid concrete and the world fades to black.