Cartoon Theories

× Woody Woodpecker ×

The Lost Episode:

One day, I was at a local Walmart, since this was the store I always go to.

Then, I see a 3-disc DVD boxset of Woody Woodpecker.

As I looked at the DVD cover, it was really faded, as I can barely see Woody, Chilly Willy, and Andy Panda, and the sticker said, "INCLUDES A LOST CARTUNE."

I was very excited to buy it since I loved Woody Woodpecker as a child.

It's in the number 4 spot on my list of cartoon shows I loved as a kid, alongside Tom and Jerry, Looney Tunes, and the Disney cartoons from the '40s-'60s.

I was also very curious because it has a lost cartoon of Woody Woodpecker.

I walked to the cash register, all happy, and when I showed the DVD to the cashier, he said, "Dude, you don't want this.

The DVD is very rare and it's in bad condition," in a soft, scared way, and I said, "Well, I'll buy it still.

How bad can this DVD be?" So I bought the DVD, and I drove home.

“Jeez Louise,” I said to myself, “What’s his problem?”

I was ready to watch the DVD with the kids, but as I opened up the DVD, one disc had no sticker label, just scribbling written in a blue marker, which I assume it said, "Head-chop" or something.

So I said, "Screw it, I'll watch it anyway with the kids."

The normal Universal logo appeared, the FBI Warnings appeared too, as well as the normal main menu, but then, there was an Easter egg, that I decided to click on, which was actually the word, "MAIN MENU."

I wish I didn't click on it.

The words, "ON/OFF" appear.

There were no questions or options.

The texts say, "ON/OFF." So I assumed it was some commentary, but for the sake of it, I chose "ON," and the cartoon played.

Again, I wished I didn't click.

I thought to myself, "This can't be horrible."

The Universal logo appeared on screen, but with the words, Universal-International, so I assume this is a Woody Woodpecker cartoon from the 1950s.

We also got the usual, "GUESS WHO?" from Woody Woodpecker, and his normal catchphrase which is his laugh, along with the original Woody Woodpecker jingle.

But then, the Woody Woodpecker jingle stopped, as the cartoon cuts to black.

It had a split second of the title card, "THIS," which I assumed the title card featured Woody Woodpecker vomiting blood.

Then, we see a shot of Woody staring at the camera for 30 seconds, sad, in a black screen.

And it featured what I assumed Grace Stafford, who voiced Woody Woodpecker, crying, without that wasn’t synched to Woody’s voice.

She wasn't actually acting sad, she wasn't crying with laughter, she was really crying.

Then, as Grace was actually voicing Woody in a sad matter, with Woody lip-synced, saying, "You disgusting minions will never laugh at me."

I was really shocked to say the least, but it gets worse.

He then tosses Buzz Buzzard's grotesque head and then a clone of himself appeared and eats Buzz's head.

As this was happening, Wally Walrus comes up and says, "What are you doing?" but not in a normal Swedish voice, it was more muffled, and was in backwards, as his face was covered with blood.

Woody says, "You." but in a different voice.

In the background, I heard what seems to be Grace crying again, and like I said, it wasn't acting, she was really sad.

And once again, it wasn't lip-synched to Woody Woodpecker.

Woody then laughs, but not in his usual catchphrase laugh or even a sinister laugh, but a laugh in pain.

Then, Knothead and Splinter, who are Woody's nephews, appear out of nowhere, and Knothead says, "Hey Uncle Woo-" and the sentence ended abruptly.

Then, it cut to 30 seconds of Woody smiling, staring at me.

Then, Knothead yelled, "DON'T DO THIS!" And then, Woody eats Knothead and Splinter alive and said, "YOU." but not in a normal Woody Woodpecker voice, but in a disturbing demon-like voice.

I said, "END THIS NOW!" and as the kids were running away, traumatized, like I was, Woody says, "Are you shocked yet?" I thought to myself, "Yes."

And then, the cartoon cuts to real life where Grace commits suicide by shooting herself.

It wasn't a prop gun; it was a real gun, and no ketchup blood, just real blood.

And I was freaked out.

The cartoon ends after that without the words, "THE END." or "A Walter Lantz Cartune."

When the cartoon fades, it was only 30 seconds of black, until a split second of I saw Woody's decapitated head, and his friends' bodies being grotesquely cut off.

I was really traumatized, and I ejected the DVD.

I said to the kids, "Kids, stay the fuck away from Woody Woodpecker!"

I avoided watching Woody Woodpecker cartoons for a month after that frightening experience.

I looked for the lost cartoon on YouTube, and the good news was, it was nowhere to be found.

I calmed myself down and watched both episodes of Woody Woodpecker, which were, "The Screwball" and "Niagara Fools" on YouTube after that tragic experience I had a month ago, and then I was happy again.

Even if I was happy watching the cartoons again, I never forget the day watching this terrible nightmare known as the lost Woody Woodpecker cartoon.

By TVBRobotnik