STARS | (editing!)

1 | memory

CHAPTER 1

   I DECIDED TO wander the streets until I could find the road I was looking for, which wasn't a good choice in some aspects. For example; my clothes were very much wrinkled and a little cut up clearly showing that I had just gone through something. My jeans were a light wash, so it made the bloodstain even more obvious than it already was. My arms were covered in dirt. I couldn't possibly imagine was my face would look like, had I remembered what I did look like. I assumed my face had been covered in dirt or some kind of soot as well. My hygiene wasn't that great either, but I tried my best to ignore the smell.  I also hoped that nobody would come up to me and ask me questions as I wouldn't be able to answer them.

Despite the feeling of my legs wanting to give out, I continued to walk against the feeling. All I wanted to do was sit down, maybe have a shower, and know what the hell is going on. Maybe a little more sleep too, something to ease my built-up anxiety. It seemed like no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't calm my heart that continued to pound against my chest. As I reached another street sign, I prayed it was the one. I squint my eyes to see the name.  

Blanc Ave.

My eyes grew wide as my brain celebrated and rejoiced at the fact that one of my prayers had been answered. I let out a shaky breath of happiness. I turned towards the three houses lined up on the street, trying to see if any of them looked even a little bit familiar.  There was a gray house with a red door and a black roof that had stuck out to me. My feet dragged my heavy body towards it. I made sure to stay away from stepping on the grass out of respect. I swallowed down the bit of liquid that crept up my burning throat. Once I reached the bold red door, I raised my shaking hand and softly knocked.

Less than two minutes had gone by and the door swung open, revealing a woman who's skin tone wasn't dark but it wasn't light either. Her raven-colored hair refused to go past her jaw, framing her seemingly perfect face shape. Her lips were full and plump, her eyes so dark brown they could be black. Her nose was perfectly placed in the center of her face. A beauty mark sat gracefully under her bottom lip. Her eyes scanned me up and down leaving me, suddenly, self-conscious about my appearance.

She finally spoke, "Natalie?"

My voice scratched my dry throat as I had let out my reply, "Yes. I think."

Her arched eyebrows scrunched in together in confusion as to why I replied so unknowingly to my own identity. She quickly looked behind her and back at me, then stepped aside telling me to come inside.

"How Uhm. How are you alive?" I could hear her voice shake slightly.

"I- I'm sorry but. Who are you?" I asked deflecting her question.

"Natalie it's me. Your best friend like ever. Hailey?" He- Hailiee's eyebrows raised.

"I'm sorry," I repeated, "But I don't remember...anything." My hands found their way to each other and squeezed.

   "Excuse me?"

   "I don't remember anything," I said again growing tired of repeating everything.

"Okay. I'll be right back. Please sit." Hailey said before leaving to room.

Once she left, I waited a couple of seconds then I tried to find out where she went my curiosity and noisiness taking over. I found her in a room with tan walls, a dark rug, and a couch. I guess this was her living room. What room was I in then? She had her back turned to me with a phone up to her ear.

"Yes, she's here." Hailey paused to wait for the person on the line to answer her.

"I don't know Austin. I did try asking. And she said she didn't remember anything." She sighed and the room ran quiet.

I felt a piercing in my heart. I felt bad for not knowing anything. Maybe I was a close friend?

"Okay. Alright, alright I'm not gonna murder the girl. Jesus. Who do you think I am Austin? Oh wow, just hurry up and get your ass over here. I'm not gonna scare her o- just get the hell over here Austin." She shouted to the phone before aggressively tapping on her phone screen.

She started to turn around, and I rushed back to where I had been before I decided to intrude on her conversation. Hailey walked back in with a heavy sigh and her hands on her hips.

"What happened to your clothes?" She asked.
  I stood there silently.

"Never mind. Stupid question, you can borrow some of mine." She ran towards the steps behind the wall where she was standing.

I felt shy ever since I got here. My anxiety mostly went away, but the lingering questions in my mind refused to stay quiet and let me calm my beating heart. I sighed and stood patiently. I'd forgotten about the pain covering my body like a blanket long ago. Now my mind was focused on the sweaty, sticky feeling that showered my body.

"Here and here's some stuff for a shower." The dark-haired woman snapped me out of my thoughts and handed me the items softly.

"Thank you." I thanked her quietly. I looked at her and didn't move.

"Oh right, sorry. Upstairs second door to your right." She pointed towards the steps.

"Thanks."

I walked quickly to the stairs and followed her instructions. I opened the smooth white door and it slowly creaked open. I walked into the room and shut it behind me. I was met with a sink on my left, toilet next to it, and a shower on my right. I turned towards the sink and looked into the mirror above it. This was the first time I was seeing myself. I was right before about the dirt on my face. There were black streaks against my cheeks and forehead and chin. My cheekbones popped out but not too much. My nose was almost button like but not quiet. My eyes were brown but not as dark as Hailey's. My lips were full enough to match the way my face had been built up. My brows were thick and tamed. Even with the dirt on my face, I could tell it was drained of all of its colors. My hair was dark brown and laid a little past my shoulders.

The way I was describing myself, it made me sound pretty. But based on what I was looking at, I was anything but.

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