STARS | (editing!)

2 | i'm sorry

CHAPTER TWO

    THE SHOWER felt heavenly against my rough skin. It pushed my sore and tight muscles into relaxation. I watched the water briefly turn red and back to clear again. The warm water replaced my anxiety with calmness and ease. Once I was done and felt clean, I turned the water off and opened the shower curtain. I had put my clothes on top of the toilet. Hailey couldn't give me a pair of underwear or a new bra, so I was forced to wear the ones I had previously. I should ask if she could take me to the store. I looked down at the closed toilet seat, and picked up the black leggings first and then the long-sleeved white knitted sweater.

Before leaving the bathroom, I took one final look at myself in the mirror. I looked better. There was a color to my lips and cheeks, I looked cleaner. Since my hair had still been wet, it now rested on top of my shoulder instead of past them due to its shortness. I will admit though, I did look a bit nicer than I did before. I sighed, knowing this was the best I was gonna get. I assumed Hailey had taken my clothes from before cause they weren't on the floor where I had messily left them. I trudged down the steps, and when I had gotten near the bottom I heard voices.

"Jesus, when is she going to get out of the shower?" A male voice sounded.

"Be patient - when she first got here she looked pretty mangled. Her clothes were ripped, she had a bloodstain on her jeans and she looked scared." Hailey explained to the male.

"Yeah, yeah I guess. It's just..if this is her-"

"It is." Hailey interrupted.

"How does she not remember anything?" The man ignored her comment.

I could practically hear Hailey shrug her shoulders. It wasn't until then that I chose to show myself. I rounded the corner and stood in front of them. The man that had been speaking, stopped and looked at me. His eyes traced me the same way Hailey's did once before. It made me want to shrink up and crawl into a hole every time someone was starring at me. I cleared my throat. The boy in front of me looked no older than twenty-two, twenty-three. His hair was the same as mine, but a slightly lighter version of it. His skin was a bit more tan and yellow than mine. And the boys' build wasn't that bad, he looked muscular but slender at the same time. He was also taller than me.

"Hey Nat, do you-do you remember me?" He questioned taking a step or two towards me.

"No, I'm sorry," I replied faster than I wanted to.

He nodded, "Okay, well, I'm Austin." Another step.

He extended a hand to me, and I politely extended mine and shook his. I gave him a small smile. He gave me a big one. Austin released my hand and shoved them into his pockets, while I let mine fall to my sides. I looked to Hailey with pleading eyes to let me stand near her instead of Austin. Not that I had a problem with him, I'm just more comfortable with her.

"Natalie! Why don't you sit next to me and we can talk." Hailey patted the spot next to her on the white plush couch.

"Okay," I said.

We all sat down, Hailey next to me, and Austin in front of me on a plush white chair. He sighed and leaned forward putting his hands together.

"So what do you remember?" He asked me quietly.

"Uhm, my name. My age. My education. And..that's it." I admitted.

"So nothing." Austin leaned back and leaned forward again, "Where did you wake up?"

"This abandoned warehouse a few miles from here," I told.

"Okay, that's...sort of helpful." Austin shrugged.

"I'm sorry I can't remember anything." I looked down at my hands being truthful about the I'd felt.

"No, no. It's okay, Austin is just... a little..confused." Hailey sighed and took my hand into hers, "You were dead a few days ago, it was all over the news. Except you were missing. So then everyone assumed you were dead."

I nodded lightly.

"If anything Austin should be sorry for being so rude." Hailey's head snapped towards the boy.

I laughed at their behavior. She was right though, he's confused, she's confused and I'm confused. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Hailey smile at me. Her teeth were aligned perfectly. What isn't perfect about her?

"You're laughing. I haven't heard that in a while." I hear Austin say quietly, "Hey, I'm sorry for being a little rude earlier. It's just- before you died. We were Uhm. Kind of together."

My head snaps towards him in the same way Hailiee's did and my eyebrows raised, "We were?"

He scratched the back of his head, "Yeah."

Well, past me knows how to pick them. There's no denying he's cute. The way his short brown hair would flop when he moved his head, the smile he so proudly would show, and his face wasn't so bad either.

"Oh..I'm sorry,"

"Can you stop fucking apologizing please?" Austin looked at me seriously.

"I'm so- yeah." I cut myself off.

After Austin, Hailey and I had a nice time talking and then catching me up on how I meant to them, I had finally built up the courage to ask the short-haired woman to take me to the store to get some clothes. I'd gotten a few shirts, leggings, jeans, and thankfully, some undergarments.

"Okay, so we have a few things. To tell you about." Austin started his eyes glued to the road.

"Like what? How I died?" I partly joked.

"More like a reason why you might've." Hailey chimed.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Well, before you died. You, me, Hailey and two other guys were apart of this..faction I guess you could call it. We were test bunnies for a government project." Austin paused.

I waited for him to continue explaining things to me, but he didn't. It looked as though he was trying to find the right words.

"What kind of project?" I questioned.

"One where we'd look like the bad guys." Hailey replied, "You know the movie The Incredibles?"

I nodded assuming she meant the first.

"Well, it's kind of like when Syndrome made a bad guy so he'd look like the hero. Except in this version, where the big machine and the government is Syndrome." Hailey tried simplifying.

I nodded quietly in understanding.

"It is a lot more complicated than it sounds," Hailey said before lying back down. Hailey then shot back up, "Wait a minute. This is not the way to my house."

"I know, when you girls were in the store, I made a call to Caleb and Joey," Austin replied quickly as he switched lanes.

"Oh," Hailey said again laying down.

My mind focused on the names. They sounded familiar but I couldn't pin them to a face or even voice. While my eyes here trained on the blurring green images speeding past the car, I felt Austin's eyes on me. It'd felt so intense he could burn a hole through my body if he wanted to. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see him shake his head and focus back on the road in front of him. My heart ached on the inside for some reason. Was it remorse? Or was it my heart saying I still had some sort of feelings for him? Whatever it was, I couldn't get rid of it. It was eating up my insides. The only words that replayed in my mind were;

I'm sorry...