Do I Wanna Know? || Ashton Irwin

5

Luke and I traveled the airport until we spotted Alya's pin-straight black hair. Being stuck in an airport with Luke was actual hell because he had no sense of direction - or refused to have a sense of direction - getting us lost, opting for walking around until we saw someone we recognized. Wonderful survival tactics on Luke's behalf.

Luke ran into his girlfriend's arms, lifting her and spinning her before setting her down and kissing her, murmuring a few sweet words to her that made her blush and giggle. The pair rekindled their relationship a year ago, since Alya was ready to be with him completely and Luke was always sort of just waiting for someone better to come along after Arina. True love meant waiting for them, right? Or was that complete bullshit?

Luke called Alya and had her promise to pick us up from the airport in the dead of night when no one would mob him.

"Hey, Talia." Alya greeted, pulling me into a hug.

"Hi." I squeezed her gently, taking in the familiar scent of her citrus perfume. She claimed it to be her signature scent, but we all knew she only continued to still wear it because it was Luke's favorite perfume she owned.

"How was the flight?" Alya picked Luke's carry-on bag as we walked to the car.

"Long." What other word could describe a red eye flight?

-

To: tasomaki7266@gmail.com

I am currently sitting in the living room I grew up in, the living room where we created a few memories of our own. My niece and nephew, Ella and Eli are running around the house laughing and smiling while my mom tries to calm my youngest nephew, Jack Jr., from a fit of cries. I wish you could be here right now because my mind keeps wandering to every possible negative and I just need you to tell me that everything is okay. I need you to remind me that things will be fine, just like you always used to do. Do you remember how often we would sit together and you would just remind me that things get better and you'd giggle and kiss my forehead, making everything perfectly fine in that moment.

My mom and dad are quiet, Xander and Sofia have not shown up, Ana and Jack aren't answering my phone calls - no one's telling me anything and I feel like the black sheep of the family. I deserve that title though, don't I? I practically fled Malibu, leaving behind my family, so I shouldn't expect them to fill me in like I've only been on a week vacation.

I had Eli hide my phone in my room so I do not call you and ask you to come because, really, why would I need you? Why would I need someone that isn't Richard? Because I love you Ashton, that's why I need you and not Richard. Sadly enough, Richard isn't even here with me. Maybe I wasn't destined to have either of you by my side.

I had plotted this email to be lengthy, but Ella is asking me to take her for a walk on the beach.

Love,

T

"T, can we go get Uncle Lukey too?" Ella tugged on my hand. Her dirty blonde hair had tight natural curls on the ends and her big brown eyes were impossible to say no to.

"We can do that." I smiled down at her as I put my shoes on. Ana believed that sidewalks were the most dirty things to exist, so she expected us adults to put shoes on when walking on them, to model what Eli and Ella should do as well. It didn't matter how short of a distance they walked, if they were walking on sidewalk, shoes were a must. But she didn't mind them walking barefoot on the beach. A mother's mind made no sense to me. "Did you invite Eli?"

She nodded furiously, "He's putting his shoes on."

And so I held their hands as three of us padded to the house two doors down. Eli hummed a song Luke sung to him a lot and Ella skipped.

"Hi, grandma!" The twins said in unison, throwing themselves in Liz's embrace.

"We came to get Lukey." Ella proudly said with her hands on her hips.

"Well, come on in!" Liz stepped aside to let us in and the twins wasted no time running in once they saw Luke sitting in the living room. They jumped on his lap, giving him the usual greeting of poking him and saying they missed him.

"Do you know what's going on?" I confronted Liz.

"It's best if you wait until this evening to find." She warned sympathetically. She squeezed my shoulder before walking off.

"Lukey, we're going to walk on the beach, lets go!" Eli exclaimed, hopping off the couch and trying to pull Luke up. Ella quickly joined by pulling Luke's other hand.

"You're so fat!" Ella huffed.

"I'm sorry I can't be as perfect as you, Ella." Luke playfully pouted as he stood up.

-

"How did Rich react when you told him you left?" Luke tucked his unruly curls behind his ears, trying to keep them from flying everywhere in the wind.

Eli and Ella walked a few steps ahead, holding hands and sometimes stopping to look at a few shells. God, it was so cold on the beach today, the twins were crazy for wanting to walk along it.

"I don't think he noticed or even cared." I called Richard as soon as I landed in LAX to tell him I had left. "His attention has been soaked into that admission test, he wouldn't realize if I was hooking up with someone behind his back." I shut myself up after saying that. I had a way of making myself so fucking obvious without even meaning to.

I was going to give myself away if I continued to talk. For the rest of the walk I listened to Luke talk about the new single and how much Allan praised the work Noelle and I did on the outfits. Luke said the new single was something I didn't want to listen to, if I happened to listen to I would need to prepare myself for anger and some sadness. He spoke about how things between him and Alya were going. Apparently marriage was a high possibility to happen between them soon, they were just waiting for Luke to get some time off from work so they could do everything from the proposal to the planning to the actual wedding to the honeymoon properly.

It all seemed unbelievable, the fact that we were growing up, things were changing, we still weren't as close as we used to be. It's not something I could get used to, I was in a love-hate relationship with change.

-

We stood in the kitchen, all of us, mom, dad, Xander, Sofia, baby Lukas, Jack Jr., Liz, Andrew, Ben, and Luke, no sign of Ana or Jack. Eli and Ella were in the living room watching cartoons.

Everyone was quiet except for little Jack, who was still fussy.

"Can someone just tell me what's going on?" I broke the silence to stop myself from nervously drawing blood from my lip.

"Ana and Jack..." My mom's voice cracked. "They're gone..." She handed Jack Jr., to my dad as she held her sobs in.

"They just went on a trip, right?" Luke asked in some suspicion.

"The plane..." Liz wiped her eyes of tears. "It's crashed. No one survived."

I took a glimpse at everyone standing in the room; heads were down, tears were being shed, and some were lending a comforting back rub. Luke and I were the only people who were in too much denial to process Liz's words.

"You're lying!" I shouted, my bottom lip trembling beyond my control.

"They were coming back from Seattle and...the plane just crashed somewhere in Oregon." My mom hid her face in her hands.

"This is some sick joke." Luke pushed himself off the counter. "I didn't come back to Malibu to be lied to!"

"Luke," Liz held her son's arm to stop him from walking off. She knew his tendency to walk off when he heard something he didn't like and she always stopped him from storming off from her. "We aren't lying."

Andrew handed Luke a newspaper and Xander handed me an article on CNN's website. I scanned the article until I saw Ana and Jack's names confirmed as the passengers they had identified so far.

Though, the words were right before my eyes, I was still in denial. My sister... she couldn't be gone.