Fire on the Horizon

Chapter 18: Diplomatic Words Spoken

The docking at the Citadel took a little more time than Shepard would have liked. She finally received the call from Joker that they were clear to disembark. Garrus stood up and tossed his datapad on the bed. He had been reading some books by Earth authors that he had heard mentioned. Currently he was engaged in anything and everything Sparta. Not surprising really.

They made their way off the Normandy and filed out onto Docking Bay 24. Garrus nodded toward some of the other turians that had found their way to the relative safety the CItadel currently offered. Garrus escorted Shepard, very officially actually, to Huerta and her meeting Kaidan. Shepard had to wonder if part of that was to be seen by his own people and by Kaidan.

As they entered into the hospital lounge, Thane called them over. He wasn't doing well, but he was able to talk and to enjoy some company. After spending some time visiting, Shepard let her gaze fall towards Kaidan's room. Thane looked at Garrus who just rolled his eyes and shook his head in response.

"Not a meeting you are looking forward to Shepard?" Thane's voice broke into Shepard's thoughts.

"Hmm? Oh, not really no. I need to get a point across and I am trying to figure out a diplomatic way to do it." She templed her fingers and sat back looking at the doorway.

Garrus cleared his throat and sat back in the lounge chair. "Let's see. He trashed you on Horizon. Sent a sort of apology letter that was more like a woe is me this is why I'm depressed and it's your fault sob story. You moved on. He sees you again and then decides to make the jealous boyfriend speech, except Cerberus was the target not me. You also told him, from what I understand from Liara, to kick rocks back on Mars. I think diplomatic is something that isn't going to really help. Blunt force trauma to the head yes. Diplomatic kindness, not so much."

Thane smirked a bit. "Yes, the Major does seem to be a bit..what to humans call it...thick when it comes to a relationship with you. Most men would realize they had been too harsh and driven you into the arms of another. He doesn't seem to."

"Well despite the mainstream view of this, I still know him enough. We spent two years together. Diplomatic works with him. So, that's what I am leading with." Shepard stood up and smoothed out her pants. She felt something touch her hand and looked down.

Thane had handed her a small pistol. She looked at the pistol and looked at Thane with a raised eyebrow.

"For when diplomacy does not work." His dulcet tones replied.

Jane shook her head and chuckled as she walked off.

The doors opened and standing in front of Kaidan was Udina. She nodded at the councilor as he left and waited for the doors to shut firmly behind him. Taking a seat, she handed Kaidan some whiskey she had bought for him.

"Got this for you. How are you doing?"

Kaidan took the bottle. "Wow, that's really nice. Thanks."

Jane cringed inwardly. Everything Kaidan said either sounded like he had no idea how to put the correct emotional response on his words or like he was being a sarcastic dick.

They talked for a few minutes about the open spectre position, family, and how Kaidan was doing. When they were done, Jane decided to let Kaidan bring up the relationship issues.

"Is there something else you wanted to talk about Kaidan?" Jane prepared herself for it.

"Shepard, is there something going on with you and Garrus?" Kaidan asked with that tone in his voice that said not only did he know, but there was a fight he was ready for.

"Kaidan..." Shepard sighed for a bit and opened her mouth to continue when Kaidan cut her off.

"Don't lie to me Jane!"

"Whoa!" It was that tone and that word that made Garrus turn his head. He could hear what was going on anyway, but that tone of us was the kind you hear a mother use when she tells her kids to sit down or when a line has been crossed.

Garrus listened, but stood up and began to walk towards the door. Just in case.

"You hold up right there Kaidan. You humiliated me on Horizon. You not only dragged me down, you ripped my heart out, and you did it in front of my crew. I get it. I was dead and apparently the first thing I should have done was contacted you. Here's the thing. I knew you well enough to know you would have moved on, if you weren't knee deep in your own self pity. Either way, if there was an us it would need to be rekindled."

Kaidan went to open his mouth, but Jane shut him down.

"No, I listened to you on Horizon. You even sent a letter to make sure I had to listen some more. YOU are going to listen to ME now. You crushed me then Kaidan. You just shut me down. We were ready to walk down the aisle together. The one person in this galaxy that should have had my back was you. You hung me out to dry instead. I thought I had literally no one. Just another reminder of what I had lost."

She stood up and began pacing the room. She stopped with her arms crossed as she gazed out the window. She hadn't intended to, but something caught her eye. It was the tip of one of the cherry blossom trees in the old Citadel tower. Her mind clicked in with the memory of meeting Garrus for the first time. That memory made her smile. At the time she knew he was a missing piece to her life, she just didn't know where that piece fit, until recently.

She remained looking out the window. "That night, Garrus showed up at my quarters. Not for a sexual advance. Just to hang out. To help me forget what you had done. To forget the pain. We had some beers, ate some food, and watched the game. He passed out on my sofa in my quarters and I passed out on the bed. Kaidan, it took months before I approached him. Part of that was because of what you had put me through. Part of it was because I didn't think he saw me that way. The other part was because I knew I had feelings and your actions made me terrified of them."

She leaned her ass on the cabinets near the window and turned to Kaidan. "Is there something between me and Garrus. I don't know how he feels about it, but fuck I hope so. I hope there is something. I hope the one person in this god forsaken galaxy that I can still trust cares for me as much as I do him. I hope he has my back. I hope there really is no Shepard without Vakarian, because if what happened with you came out of his mouth, then the reapers wouldn't need to take me out. I'd have that covered. Is that clear enough for you Major Alenko?"

The look on Kaidan's face was a mix of shock and anger. Not exactly what Jane expected to see. It took him a minute to speak, but when he did the words weren't what she expected either.

"I understand. I hurt you Jane. But, you need to know something. I'm not seeing anyone and I still care. I would do anything to take away what I said on Horizon. I know I can't, so instead I'm going to do what it takes to prove I'm the one you need to be with. That this thing with Garrus is just filling a void temporarly, until you can let me back into your heart."

There were about a million and five things Jane could say at that point. She actually didn't know what to say. She was hoping his delusional reaction of them still having any sort of chance was due to the pain meds. Maybe he hit his head harder than she thought.

"Kaidan, I'm going to get a nurse for you. I think she needs to check the level of your medication. It's making you delusional."

Jane started to walk out. The doors slide open and Kaidan caught sight of Garrus waiting on her. He smiled at the turian, and since Jane had her back to Kaidan she couldn't see it. Garrus nodded at him and began walking toward Jane. He stopped short in his tracks when Kaidan spoke.

"Jane!?! Never forget I love you."

Kaidan's words hung with the exact intent he meant them. Jane stopped in the doorway. Garrus glared and Kaidan knew at that point he would do whatever it took to get Jane back. If nothing else to take something from Garrus that Garrus had taken from him.