The Life Of Isaac...

Chapter 1: The Dream

           *September 2, 2021*
               Today was a... well, today was alright. Basically the same kind of day I always have. I still hope sooner or later I will find someone. I'm sick and tired of feeling left out of everything at my school. Its Sophomore year and literally everybody in High School has a boyfriend or girlfriend. I'll admit it. At first, I thought it was just dumb. That it would just cause more shit to be thrown at people at my school. Including me, if I have a relationship. But I really want to find someone. I'm tired of being lonely. I'm tired of just having Esther by my side all the time. Even though I love her so much. She is my best friend in like, the whole world. But I don't like her like that. At least I don't think I do. Who knows. Anyways, I will write in you in the morning.

-Isaac.

                                  My mother taps on my door with her wedding ring that she still wears. She knows I hate it when she does that. But she does it anyways.

"Cmon, Isaac. You have been writing in that journal all day. You need to go to bed" She tells me.

      Fun Fact: I hate going to bed. Well, not really a fun fact. Its just a fact. Its literally something you can expect to hear out of every teenager.

         "Like I said a thousand times, mom. Its not a journal. Its a diary. And I know you have been trying to snoop and try to read it when I'm not looking" I reply.

"Well, excuse me for wanting to be a concerned parent. Ever since your father died-" She pauses.

"-That was months ago, mom. I know you want to check if I am okay. But I am still here" I say.

"I guess just... writing down my thoughts makes me feel better. I've been doing it long before dad died in the accident".

         Information time. 6 months ago.. my dad was killed in a car accident. A 2019 Ford F-150 rammed his car head first. My dad was in the way while the guy was speeding on a freeway and he was an "accidental" open target. At least that's what the guy said. He ended up flying through the windshield. His skull cracked open and he couldn't be saved. I ended up getting the news when I was called home from school on that day. My mom got the news while she was at work and she rushed out to get me. That was the worst day of my life. My mom's included.

"I just worry. After dad died.. you didn't eat for days. Almost a week. You didn't talk to anybody. Not even the counselors at your school" She says.

                   This isn't the first time I've heard my mom bring up my dad since the accident. She has done this quite a couple times. Like, the times where I write in my diary so much that I forget what the time is. Like right now. It starts to get annoying after a while, but at least she means well.

              "I get it, really. You worry. But I am fine. I'll go to bed right now. Goodnight" I tell her.

         "Okay, Isaac. I love you. Goodnight" She kisses me on the head and leaves the room, and shuts the door on her way out.

                  God, I'm tired. Okay, maybe sometimes I like going to bed. But not all the time. I'm just glad to be out of that conversation with my mom. It has always been hard for us to talk about my dad. I've had so many people ask me questions or ask if I'm doing okay and it annoys the living hell out of me. People can never mind their own business. Especially when someone is in the grieving process. Who would honestly think that after something tragic that has happened in their life, the person would want to be showered with questions about it? People who have no respect for how other people feel. It makes me so annoyed.