Chapter 23: Im Gay

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                   A day has passed. It's Saturday now. I didn't go to school for the whole week, which I really don't mind. Getting caught up with my schedule after missing out on a lot of class is going to be a bitch though. But at least I'm still doing the homework. I don't want to be missing out on the homework so I have piles of it on my desk whenever I return. I would rather shove pencils in my eyes and call it a day. It's the afternoon and I've been up for only a few hours now. I was talking it up with Amaya all night. Esther and Hunter where fast asleep. Esther, surprisingly. She mainly never goes to sleep early on the weekends. I guess this was one of her rare early-bed time nights. The kind of nights she hates to have but sometimes just can't resist having. I have those nights too, just about as much as she does. But I try to resist because It's my only time I can stay up as late as I want during the school year. Unless there's a holiday vacation. Which, surprisingly, there wasn't for this thanksgiving this year. Guess the school desperately wants us out so they don't give us many breaks.

Currently, River is here and I plan on coming out. I feel like I'm fully ready to do this. Okay, mostly ready. Ugh, partially ready. Fine, I'm not ready at all. I don't have to worry about Esther because I pretty much told her when I said I liked River. I've never had feelings for a girl or anyone else. None that I remember. I bet I've had "crushes" before but it was probably because I thought that the person was cute. I had no close-to-fully-developed brain like I do now. Shallowness is the one of the main things in a 0-11 year old child's brain. It's not like we mean it to be that way. It's just like that. We have no personal control at that age. Our brains don't know what the fuck to have us do.

But anyways, It's kind of about time I come out. It's not like I should be scared. The 21st century is way more accepting than it was in the 20th century. And I doubt River would care. Esther didn't seem to. But she did say she would mentally cheer me on in telling him just in case I get nervous or chicken out. She insists on me telling him, for some reason. But honestly, I have a hunch on why. She still thinks that River could like me too, and even though there is that chance, I highly doubt that's the case. What's to like?

We all gather into basically my room, the hangout area.

   "Sorry it's a mess. I didn't really have the desire to clean" I say.

   "Don't worry about it. I'm not a germaphobe," River says.
   
  "My room is worse than this".

  "Your room is always clean when we come over" Esther says.

   "I clean my room when I have friends or family over, but besides that, I keep it the way it is" River says.

   "You know, Isaac, you could've cleaned," Esther says.

    "After all, we are letting you live here".

  "I'm sorry if I have little to no energy when I wake up in the morning," I say.

  "And since when do you mind?".

   "I'm just kidding. Chill" Esther laughs.

   "You're an asshole" I say.

    "That makes 2 of us," She says.

   "So. What's the plan? I don't know about you guys, but I don't want to just stand around and do absolutely nothing".

   "I don't know" I say.

   "I'm in the music mood right now, for some reason" River says.

   "Karaoke Machine it is," Esther says.

   "I'll go get it". Esther leaves the room.

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