CringeFest 2019: The Chaos

Crucifijo II

Thursday.

"Yo," says Sandee holding a red box in her right hand. "Have you ever played the mooncake dice game?"

"Heard of it, but we're not Chinese," Ann replies. "Is that mooncake? Did you shrink the moon and cook it?"

Sandee smirks. "Yes. I did."

"How much did you win?"

Sandee puts down the box and opens it. "Second place. Also got third, three fifths, and a lot of sixths which I already ate for breakfast."

"That's just second, right?" Ann asks.

"Yeah. People were fighting over it because I got mine on the second roll only. Lol," Sandee replies. "It was chaos."

"You wanna know a more chaotic fact?" Ann responds.

"What?"

"Announcement of SportsFest houses for new students in T minus 11 days," Ann announces.

"Dude," Sandee reacts. "Seriously?"

"Yep," Ann answers. "Henrik's Crucifijo, that's for sure. Leia's also Crucifijo."

"How'd you know Leia's?"

"Because I'm psychic."

"Seriously? Umm..."

"No, but in all seriousness, I'm joining the SportsFest committee. So, I get to pick who goes where and shit."

"But what if—"

"Hellllo!" April greets, passing through the door like any normal person would.

"SportsFest next Thursday," says Ann.

"Wait, what?" April gasps.

"Nah, just kidding! It's only the SportsFest houses we're getting for new students. My bad."

"Let's hope all the good athletes go to Campavio," says Sandee.

"'Campavio'?" Ann repeats. "I think you meant to say Crucifijo?"

"Cangrejo," says April.

"Dude! You're a fricking Navio; you're supposed to cheer for your own house!"

"It's exactly because she's a Navio that she's associating with the CangreHos," says Ann.

"I wonder what house Ms. Goldberg is," says Sandee.

"She doesn't seem like the athletic type to me," says Ann. "I'd put her in Campana."

"Do you hate our house that much?" questions Sandee.

"Nah, it's just that Campana's where all the intellectuals go," she replies. "Shame they didn't add me in. Then Campana would've won."

"So if you're Crucifijo and all of the intellectuals are in Campana, what does that tell you?" Sandee riddles.

"Look at April. She's not Campana."

"I'm stupid," says April.

"If Campana and Crucifijo don't win, let's make an agreement to cheer for Navio," Sandee suggests.

"Pshh. Crucifijo losing? Navio winning? Nah. Ain't happening."

"Why are you guys talking about SportsFest already?" Vick asks walking in.

"Any friends in Grade 7?" Ann asks back. "Because their SportsFest houses are gonna be announced on Monday."

"That soon?" Vick replies.

"Next Monday," Ann corrects.

"I don't really have friends in Grade 7?"

"Do you have friends?"

"Well, if you're implying that I don't have any friends, then I guess you're my enemy and I hate you."

"We're all frenemies when it comes to SportsFest," Sandee declares.

"Where'd the extra F-R come from?" Ann asks.

"Where'd the extra C-R-U-C-I-F-I-J-O come from, the trash?" Vick responds.

"Vick! Why'd you cheer for Crucifijo?" April queries.

"Well, then!" Ann exhaled. "Fuck Cangrejo! It's three of us Crucifijo against Crap—"

"Ann, if you don't stop swearing, I'm reassigning you to Cangrejo so that you can replace Franc," Kim interrupts.

"Nah, sorry. SportsFest committee can't reassign people. You know that, right?"

Kim stares with a confused look. "Well, how do you know?"

"Simple," Ann replies. "Omniscience is the power of a member of the Spark! That's right, the online newspaper club nobody really cared about is also the school's all-seeing eye!"

"Prove it," replies Kim. "How many members are there in my club?"

"There are 25 people in the Martial Arts club," Ann answers. "18 of them were there last year. You aren't one of them."

"Wait, so are you just observant or—"

"Dumbass. We don't know the exact time you go in and out of the bathroom, unless it's that important."

"But anyone can be observant," Kim argues.

"Well, it's not only that, of course," Ann replies. "Mrs. Preston's our club moderator. She gives us the dates, she gives us the locations. We observe on those dates and go to the venues. We then report the details. All of them."

Kim backs off.

"We are the Spark."