When the words leave my mouth, I feel everything shatter. Yet not in a completely bad way.
Instead it's the pressure that shatters.
As if the world has given me time to breathe. As if the universe finally relents from the harsh ways that have been set on me since a child.
As if everything simply wants to give me an easy path.
And I see the same thing happen to Yoongi. The way a gasp only very lightly falls from his lips, the rest stuck in his throat as his chest never falls after the action. Or through how his shoulders rise up along with his emotions. But the last is the most obvious. I can see the drop of a tear that leaves his eye only for a few more to fall after.
I know the same thing is happening because I'm a mirror of his actions. Only my breath leaves in the form of a shaky exhale.
"I'm sorry if you wanted to forget it." I murmur, shaking my head. "But I- I didn't. Because that was the first someone hugged me and just let me cry. You didn't tell me to stop, you didn't tell me it was stupid. You didn't tell me to just wait it out. You just let me cry." I take in a raspy breath and swallow, knowing my cheeks are also wet. "I haven't just cried before. Not even in front of the ones I thought would let me."
Yoongi looks down, his blue hair covering his eyes that are undoubtedly releasing tears. I see the droplets fall onto the concrete beneath him.
"Yoongi, if you want to believe this never happened then believe this never happened. I won't force you to remember." I whisper. When he doesn't react, I very lightly step forward and reach out, tapping his shoulder just as he had done with me.
Very slowly, he raises his head.
And my breath is stolen.
I can't help but appreciate the raw emotion in this beautiful mans face.
His eyes are shining and glistening, crystal like tears are mapping cheeks that are flushed against the natural pale skin. With the blush, his thin lips show more. They tremble as he clenches his teeth, showing the pristine white while his lips tilt down. The movement narrows his eyes, only forcing more tears to fall.
With another gulp, I take one more step forward before then reaching out and wrapping my arms around his shoulders.
His hands don't reach for me, but he does respond. His head falls forward, landing on my shoulder.
"Don't you want to forget?"
I shake my head.
"Never."
☆♬○♩●♪✧♩ ♩✧♪●♩○♬☆
The walk is finished in silence, but the two of us huddle close instead this time. The constant brush of our shoulders helps us both understand the presence the two of us have. It makes me feel less alone and slowly, it helps Yoongi to stop crying.
"I'm sorry for making you cry." I whisper, glancing to him sadly.
He doesn't look at me, instead shaking his head. "Don't apologize." He whispers. "Let's just rest. We need to practice tomorrow and tonight. We should sleep."
And that's what we do.
When we get to the hotel, Yoongi announces he's going to take a shower. I simply get into bed, looking out the window to the city of Daegu.
A place that neither of us are supposed to be in but we're here.
To prove everyone wrong.
The smallest smile rests on your lips.
We'll prove everyone wrong.
☆♬○♩●♪✧♩ ♩✧♪●♩○♬☆
"Yah, why are you crying now?" She asks, eyeing me and my violin that is dented from the abuse that my mom bestowed upon it.
I look up to her, another sob wracking my body. "What am I supposed to do? It can't even make its noise anymore. Its hurt. He's hurt." I hug the violin close to my body, my body shivering as it skims the injury upon its skin. I rest my forehead against him, more tears falling as I cry.
"It'll be fine. Just buy another."
"But he was my first violin!" I pause to sniff, "I don't want to replace him."
"Stop calling the thing a 'him'. That's weird. And it doesn't matter. Instruments are just tools. The thing was holding you back, you could barely play on it. Now stop crying." She scowls before nudging my shoulder. Well, more of shoving. The action is harsh enough for me to lightly fall back, the violin landing on me too. As if still trying to protect me.
"Can't I cry a bit more? He was the one who got me into music." I fight against her words though its weak, and she knows it. I'm going to force myself to stop and force past the emotion, most likely bottling it up until I get home to cry alone.
"No. Come on. You're wasting my time with all this crying. I have to go in an hour!"
Another sniff and gulp, forcing back a sob.
As I stand, I harshly rub my eyes to stop the tears and take a deep breath.
"Good."
And she leads me to the stage.
But even as he does I still have one thought on my mind.
I just wanted to cry.
End of Chapter Seventeen
Severely unedited ( It's very late I'm sorry ^^;; )
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The Silence We Fill | MYG
Fanfiction"Don't you see? They're out there, waiting for us! They sit there, all eyes watching the stage, wanting something more than a machine. They don't want simple notes, they would rather have silence. No, they want emotion. So let's give it to them Yoon...
