The Things I Never Said [To You] | inksmoker

02.11.2018

i'm not worthy of this religion

how the fuck can i be?

i don't believe in your plan

i don't believe in a better tomorrow-

it's not that i don't want to

it's just that i can't

i've been constantly lied to,

 constantly thrown aside,

there isn't no good outcome to this

i'm not worthy of this religion when i can't even force myself

to be positive about a new light -

where is the damn light?

how can i fucking see it when my whole life was spent in darkness

is this your plan?

is this my better tomorrow?

i'm not fucking worthy of this religion

not when i can't believe you're watching

all of this and i'm still here

crying the same old fucking song

i want to believe

it's not that i don't want to

but it's so hard to smile for tomorrow

without it turning into a frown

it's so hard to think something good is going to come

after all of this shit

will i even be alive till then?

no, how the fuck can i be alive till then??

i don't want a fucking future

if this is my present,

i don't want a future like this-

i want to live

be happy

and be able to live those moments where i pray to you because I AM happy

not only when i'm feeling fucking terrible

they don't listen to anything i say

it's always my fault,

they don't need to say it

because they always fucking prove it to me

i'm not worthy of this religion,

how the fuck can i be?

i don't believe in your plan

i don't believe in a better tomorrow

it's not that i don't want to

it's just that i've been wronged so many times

i don't know how to keep believing anymore