Demons (Rainbow Six x PTSD Male Reader)

Hell's Bells

Y/N POV

The images of what you'd done echoed out every time you closed your eyes. Blood covered hands slowly carving into dead bodies. Their blood pooling at your feet. The soles stained a deep shade of crimson. Every night you woke in a cold sweat. Everyone was watching you carefully. You'd never admit it, but you were scared. Not of Demons, not what other thought about you. You were scared of yourself. Of what you'd done. 

You now laid in bed, staring at the ceiling. Sleep was not something that would come easy lately. After deciding that trying to sleep was pointless, you climbed out of bed without a sound. Slowly, you crept across the floor. Ela stirred a little and you froze. You stood there waiting for her breathing to go back to normal. When it did, you slipped out without a sound.

Calmly, you opened the door to the workshop and sat down. In front of you was a blueprint. The schematics of the worlds most expensive bullet, project He'll Bell. The perfect weapon to shut down the Demons chip. It's name was given because of the bell shaped casing. It was to block the chip from transmitting the demon program away. The code would scramble and the chip would fry itself out. The major problem was the device inside. The blast of a gun would shatter the electrics inside. You held up the prototype, now with a titanium case. Your reflection was crystal clear on the smooth, grey surface. You ran your hand over the bullet. It was cold to the touch. 

Suddenly the bullet was stained red. You looked at your hands and saw them covered in blood. Whipping around, you saw ten bodies chained to the wall. All of them were sliced open. You stepped down into something warm. You looked down and saw you were shin deep in blood. In the torn open chest of the far right body was a beating heart. "No. No no no no." You turned back to your bench and found it was gone. Before you lay the members of Rainbow. Standing over them was a figure. In the figures hand was a blood covered knife. He turned towards you. It was you. He lunged towards you but a gust of wind blew from the west. Your duplicate faded in a black smoke. Slowly, you made your way through your fallen comrades. Their lifeless eyes stared up at you. 

Some coughed off to your left. It was Monika. You ran to her side and she looked up at you. Blood tricked down from the corner of her mouth. "Y-you did this. Why?" Before you could ask what she was talking about she die. You held her lifeless body close. When you opened your eyes, you felt cold steel chains digging into your wrists. Sirius stood in front of you. In his hand was a hot needle. "Now now, don't squirm to much. You'll ruin my masterpiece." He plunged the needle deep into your abdomen. A cry of pain escaped your lips as the smell of cooking flesh filled the room. A sharp pain spiked your shoulder. "I told you not to move!" Sirius's thumb dig into a long gash that ran across your chest. 

You shot up with a yell. Twitch jumped back in fear. Your eyes darted around your surroundings. You were in the workshop still. Your heart felt like it was going to beat right out of your chest. You took a shaky breath. I was just a dream. No, not a dream, a nightmare. You looked at your hands. Not one drop of blood. You truly felt like you were in hell.