☼euphoria || Ponyboy Curtis fanfiction

☼ ₂₁

« I wanna tell her but she already knows, that i love her so. »

*Trigger Warning: talks about suicide*

ROWAN P.O.V.

I walked over to him and sat down on the chair that was beside the bed. I just looked at his face.

"You fucking bastard." I whispered, shaking my head.

"I can't believe I'm in love with a fucking bastard."

☾

I walked all the way to school alone that day.

Two-Bit usually attends school, but he was skipping to look over Ponyboy, since Soda and Darry couldn't afford to take the day off. 

Steve was currently working a shift at the D.X., so he also wouldn't be there. Ponyboy was obviously sick, Coral was away, and Johnny was dead.

So that leaves me, all alone. Today was going to be hell and I knew it. I pulled out my brand-new pack of cigarettes and took the first one out.

I rested it against my lips and hesitated a moment before lighting it up. 

Call me crazy, but every time I smoked a cigarette it reminded me of Johnny. The times we spent at the church really brought us closer. We would always smoke together and talk about life. 

A wave of sadness washed over me. I really missed Johnny. Thoughts of joining him made their way to my mind, but I knew I couldn't give in.

I put my hood over my head for the rest of the walk. It was chilly anyways.

I finished my cigarette right when I arrived at school.

Talk about timing.

I really didn't want to be here right now, and if it was up to me, id probably be sleeping.

 Nonetheless, I put out my cigarette and walked up to the main entrance. I made my way inside and gagged at all the people.

I hadn't missed them one bit.

Apparently, while I was gone I became quite the celebrity, because everyone looked at me with wide eyes as I made my way to my locker. 

I glared at everyone that my eyes fell upon, making them look away in fear.

When I made it to my locker, I opened it, and grabbed out my binder and agenda. I slammed the locker door as hard as I could, making a couple people around me jump.

I was about to walk away to my next class when I saw someone who I really didn't need to see right now.

Randy.

His eyes landed on me, and he smirked. He walked obnoxiously all the way to where I was standing.

"Oh if it isn't Miss Valance. Haven't seen you around here in a while, I thought you flunked out." He joked, making his friends laugh, even though it wasn't even funny.

"No, I'm passing all my classes. Unlike you." I replied, making him glare at me.

"Well, if you'd excuse me, I don't have all day. I'm going to class." I said, turning around and walking away.