The What Happens When Fanboys and Death Note Mix Christmas Special

Jay and Silent Bob Have Changed or Christmas Part 1

*Jay and Silent Bob are at their job at the cocoa bar. Silent Bob has a boomboc going and Jay is rapping*

Jay: Fork, fork, fork,
Mutha muthafork,
Mutha muthafork fork
Muthafork muthafork
Noich noich noich
1, 2, 1 2 3 4
Noich noich noich
Decking halls, jingle bells
Making cocoa making toys
Making toys toys toys toys
Wrapping presents it's that time,
What is that time? Christmas time
Wrapping gifts at Christmas time—

*A young looking customer walks up*

Customer: Cocoa with Kahlua.

Jay: 15 bucks, little man,
Put that stuff in my hand
If that ID doesn't show
You gotta go, go, go.
Mah jungle love, yeah!
Owe-owe-oh
I think I wanna know ya know ya
yeah what!

*Customer shows ID, Jay hands him a cocoa.*

Jay: Here you go man. Merry Christmas!

Boss: Alright you two. You can go.

Jay: Thanks boss!

Boss: It's a shame it's your last day here.

Jay: Sorry man. We gotta go home. Hopefully we'll be able to come back next year or something though.

Boss: Alright. Merry Christmas you guys!

Jay: You too!

Ravage: Hey you guys keep in touch!

Jay: You know it, Ravage!

*Jay and Silent Bob leave*

Jay: Alright fat boy let's—oh right. I keep forgetting that you lost all that weight with that magic weight loss bread they had here. I'll think of some new nicknames for you soon.

Silent Bob: *about to say something, then stops*

Jay: Meanwhile, I got a magic boost in quitting smoking weed! I did it for Holly. Well, let's get back to the workshop and pack up since when we ended up staying, Lucas drive us back home so we could pack our stuff.

*When they get back, the task force is cleaning up the workshop*

Connor: Hey guys!

Jay: Hey Connor.

*Santa Paws and Buckbeak run up to them*

Jay: Hey you two!

*Jay and Silent Bob pet the dogs*

Lucas: Jay, Silent Bob, come with me.

Jay: *looks over at Silent Bob nervously* *gulp* What'd we do now?

Lucas: *leads them into the room with the naughty and nice list* I want to show you something.

*shows them the nice list, and that their names are on it*

Jay: !!! FOR REAL?!

*Jay and Silent Bob high five*

Lucas: I've noticed a major change in you two. You came here, sort of willing to do anything, causing a lot of trouble, secretly dealing drugs, but now look at you! Silent Bob, you've slimmed down a lot, and you've been great at making the toys and taking care of the dogs and everything, and Jay, you've changed a lot too! Now you've quit smoking weed, you're the master of gift wrapping–

Jay: Thanks to Holly.

Lucas: Which brings me to my next point. You've now got a girl who loves you a lot. You guys have become great people, I'm proud of you!

Jay: Thanks Lucas!

*And so, Jay is packing his suitcase when Holly walks in*

Jay: Hey baby.

Holly: So you guys are leaving?

Jay: Unfortunately, yeah.

Holly: There's no way you can stay?

Jay: I'm sorry Holly. We would if we could. But we've got a comic shop to run, and plus there's a reboot of our movie Bluntman and Chronic coming out that we have to stop.

Holly: Oh. Some Christmas this turned out to be.

Jay: What do you mean?

Holly: I got two new best friends, I fell in love, only for them to leave at the end of the month and never come back! *Tear rolls down her eye, Jay grabs her*

Jay: Hey. Come with us.

Holly: You mean it?

Jay: Of course! Who says Jay and Silent Bob can't become Jay, Holly, and Silent Bob?

Holly: Really?!

Jay: Yeah! Listen Holly. I love you. I want to be with you. So come with us!

Holly: Ok!

Jay: *holds her tight* Best. Christmas. Ever. Snootchie Bootchies!

Later

*The sleigh is loaded, the task force stands in front of it with Lucas in front, in the full red suit. All the elves are crowded around it.*

Lucas: Alright everyone! It's almost time for the big delivery! Now, I know we've had some trouble this year. Wrapping paper machine, Jay and Silent Bob (although they did redeem themselves), a motorcycle gang, a killer moose to name a few. And yet, here it is, 11:55 on Christmas Eve night, and we managed to get everything done on time!

*The elves cheer*

Lucas: And we have a new member of the sleigh team this year too! Rudolph, with his nose so bright, is front and center, acting as our headlight tonight because it is darker than Light's soul out there!

Light: Ha ha ha screw you.

Lucas: Last minute naughty list.

Light: Yes my soul is dark.

Lucas: And now, as usual when I leave for the year, Happy is in charge until I return. Give him the same respect you give me. Thank you all for your help, and Merry Christmas!

*The elves cheer as everyone gets strapped in*

Lucas: Santa Paws, come boy! You're coming home with me this year!

*Santa Paws barks and jumps in the sleigh alongside Buckbeak*

Lucas: Is Chris's new ultra protection booster seat strapped in?

Elmira: Sure is Lucas. Thanks again for getting that specially made.

Lucas: Anything for my new nephew. Alright everyone ready?

Everyone: Yeah!

Lucas: Alrighty! On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer, on Vixen! On Comet, On Cupid, On Donner, On Blitzen! And on Rudolph!

*The sleigh starts rising and they take off as the elves cheer*

Lucas: Ho ho ho!

*The sleigh flies off into the night sky*

To be continued