It really had a nice ring to it. It angered me a bit that he would name it but I rub it off. Handro was now holding her and I see how he's staring at her and I laugh he looks so nervous . He was such a dork.
Then all hell went loose when Atiya begins crying and Handro immediately puts her on my chest and backs up looking scared.
"Dork" I snort and he rolls his eyes blushing out of embarrassment.
"Atiya mamas no cry no no no bebe" I cooe and she begins mumbling baby stuff and she stops crying. She begin scratching on her face though. I then pull her hand down away from her face and she begins turning red and wiggling around mad.
"Damn she got anger issues like you" Handro laughs grabbing her.
"Shut up" I nudge him with my foot but I regret it when my entire body aches from the movement.
"You alright Mamas" Handro ask and I ignore the nickname and just moan due to pain.
"Hold on"Handro says walking out and I hear him yelling and Atiya begins to cry again. This baby seems to be so delicate.
The doctors then ask Handro to get out.
"You already know your going to have to stay longer with this tumor on you, you sure you don't want your husband to know" the doctor ask and I immediately shake my head no. Husband? Whatever.
They then walk away and I fight the tears back and fake smile when I see Handro come back in. Guess I've done so much bad stuff I don't deserve happiness. I must've done something to have all this karma up my ass.
"Atiya, Hennessy, and Ohgeesy; shit that all sound hella fly together" he smiles sitting beside me and I keep quiet and he sighs giving my baby back.
"Look Handro it's never gonna end well with us and I rather not be hurt" I explain and he frowns.
"But I'm hurting already" he mumbles
"Because I'm not with you who I love and has my daughter" he finishes.
"Alejandro do not get happiness from NO ONE understood it's a plan to fuck yourself over" I plead and he shakes his head no, staying stubborn.
"Hennessy don't you understand I promised OUR baby I will be with you and I will"
"Not if I say no" I argue
"Why not, you like hurting me don't you, the fuck I do huh??" He yells making the baby cry.
"Just please understand we can't" I plead rubbing his hand but realize what I'm doing and let go his hand and his eyes water.
"My love for you is what's hurting me because you won't accept the fact that we're made for each other and I hate you for that" he cries out wiping the tear that fell and walking out my room.
My heart cracks but why should I?
1: were always being petty
2: I can die soon
3: were young still
4: we always end up hurt no matter what
5: my daughter doesn't need parents who are like us all the time
It just was a feeling I had for him that had to go. Atiya begins whining and I try feeding her milk but she wiggles away. I then just rock her and she begins yelling, crying, and scratching her face. I begin to feel overwhelmed and start shushing her but she continues on crying while I freaked out.
"Atiya it's okay mamas c'mere" Geesy cooes grabbing her from me while he holds his stomach who seems to be in pain but stays strong for Atiya. She stops crying and I couldn't be more thankful for him then now.
He then sits in a couch that was in the room and he puts her to sleep right away. He stays quiet, avoids eye contact, and just hums to our baby.
"I love you still yknow" I say sighing and he stays quiet.
"I really do"
"Stop just stoppp" he groans trying to cover his ears with one hand.
"Why I'm just letting yknow that I do still care"
"You want me or you don't make up your mind" he sighs kissing Atiya.
"I can still care about you and not be with you.... I just need space" I give him a weak smile but he keeps a straight face.
Atiya then squirms around and scratches her face whining. Handro then gets up shushing her but she doesn't stop. What's with this girl??
Handro then lays her next to me and he lays kinda near me to check her diaper to see if that was the problem but we realize that when she lays next to the both of us she's calm. I look at Handro who's already looking at me and I sigh nodding.
The three of us were now cuddled up while Atiya smiled adorably.
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Handro immediately records the three of us and sends it to me but I ask him not to post it. Her smile never fades and I see Handro staring down at her looking no longer nervous but happy.
I then pull Handro hair back so he can see Atiya better but I curse myself when he looks at me a certain way and he begins leaning in and I panic.
I kiss back immediately once I feel his lips and I try my best to contain myself and he holds my face pulling me closer. Once we pulled away my eyes go gooey and we just stare at each other. I then look down to an Atiya who's awake and smiling. In a weird way it felt like she knew what she was doing putting us so close.
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I know it's not a lot yet but I'm still writing and editing!!
