Texts (Tyler Joseph x Reader)

Promise.

It's been a few days since the FaceTime call with Ty. We've texted some but it hasn't been a lot. I've been busy getting ready for exams and finishing my paper. And he, well he's on tour. I keep running over the conversation in my head. Am I no longer to have my own feelings toward things? I could be over reacting but its not like I dropped all contact with him. It just hurt the way he said it. I'm not sure if I should bring it up to him or let him figure it out. Because the more I think about it the more I just don't want to deal with it. A warm tear falls off my cheek and hits my hand. I immediately wipe my eyes, in disgust. I can't believe that I am crying over a guy. I jump off the couch and go wash my face. 

"This is so dumb." I say aloud to myself, looking in the mirror I watch my eyes water up and begin to grow red. My phone goes off in the other room, I can hear the ringtone and know that it's a call. I slowly walk over to the ringing phone and answer. 

"Hi." I say quietly, sitting on the couch.

"Hey, are you okay?" Tyler's voice on the other end fills my right ear. I swallow hard trying to breathe and not cry again.

"Yeah fine why?" I try and make my voice sound strong but fail as it cracks in the middle.

"You sound like you're crying. Y/n, what's wrong." His voice is soft and it makes me cry harder. I feel like such a child. "Hey, hey it's okay." He says on the other line, he definitely heard it get worse.

"I-i'm sorry." I choke out, I'm not  sure if I should just hang up the phone or stay on with him. I leave it for a second and he answers calmly.

"Deep breaths." I do as instructed trying to calm down some, "okay so what's the matter?" He asks once I've calmed down some.

"For the other night." I say and the tears being to start up like someone turning on a faucet. I try to breathe through it but it doesn't want to stop. 

"Hey it's okay. You're fine." Ty says to me. My thumb hovers over the end call button and I really want to end it. I don't want him to hear me crying. My thumb touches the button and I just set my phone down beside me and let my head fall into my hands. It feels like there is a lump in my throat and my chest is tight. My breath is so shaky that I feel light headed so I slide to the floor, curling up in a ball. I begin rock back and forth, my head on my knees. I want to scream but nothing comes out. My phone is going off beside me but no matter how I try to reach for it my body won't move. I know I'm in a full blow panic attack but I can't calm myself down. I try to reach for my phone hoping hearing his voice will calm me down but instead I let out one giant sob. My breath begins to quicken and try to do everything in my power to slow it down. Nothing is working but I finally can reach for my phone. I see through my blurry vision that there are several missed texts and calls. I open the texts.

Ty - Did you hang up?

Are you okay?

Y/N?

Hey please answer my calls. I'm worried.

Hey please?

It's going to be okay. 

I'm going to call again please answer.

The last text buzzes and no longer than ten seconds later his call comes through. I hit accept and his face appears on my screen. "Hey what's going on are you okay?" He asks is voice concerned but low. I can tell he is on the tour bus. I exit out the FaceTime to text him cause I can't speak yet let alone breathe.

Me - i'm having a really bad panic attack and can't speak right now. not even sure how i'm typing tbh.

"Hey, hey it's okay. Deep breaths okay? In.." He starts and I follow along with what he instructs, "and out." My breath is still shaky but it begins to become controlled. I repeat this a few times until I can't finally breathe. I slowly gain control of myself and I get up and collapse on the couch. "Hey. How you feeling?" He asks once I come back onto the call. "Exhausted. But better." I say my voice low and cracking slightly. I  wipe my face trying to hide it. "You are beautiful don't try to hide your face." Tyler says to me, making me warm up inside. I lower it to show him a smile and he returns it.  

"Thank you." I say to him. "Hey it's no problem at all. I wish I could give you a hug. Those things are the worst." He runs his hand through his hair following down his neck which he rubs for a little bit. "Yeah I haven't had one since we started talking. It may because finals are coming up and I'm really stressed." My chest still feels like a small infant is sitting on it, my throat is also a bit tight. "Well don't worry about me cause I'm always going to be here for you." He says to me not missing a beat the words fall out of my mouth without me even realizing it. "You promise?" A smile appears pulling his lips apart to expose his perfect teeth. "I promise." I talk to him until a fall asleep. That night I will always remember. He promised that he would be there for me, always. I just hope I can do the same thing.