little by little | jungkook

thirty one

song- i feel like i'm drowning ~ two feet

'and they say you're suspicious,
you keep dreaming and dark scheming .'

—

mi na p.o.v.

there we sat in the dark, outside of the hotel sehun and chanyeol were staying at. sehun held my small hand in his and we stayed like this for awhile in complete silence.

"this conversation is not over."

"no, i'm not going to let you beat the shit out of jungkook."

"okay well just give me his address and i'll go alone. that way you don't have to watch." he said back with a proud smile on his face.

i sighed and let out a soft laugh. we had been going back and forth like this for atleast an hour already. after sehun had forced me to take him to jungkook's house, i began driving in that direction before realizing that i just couldn't set him up like that.

yes, things didn't go so smoothly last night but i cared about him and obviously he cared enough about me to apologize plus what had happened in the car wasn't too bad. he just lost control over his anger. right?

instead of going all the way to jungkook's house, i just drove in random circles while taking different shortcuts and backroads each time to make it seem to sehun that i was on a completely different route when rather i was driving past the same area each time.

i failed to remember that sehun isn't stupid.

eventually he told me to just stop because he caught on to what i was doing and i decided to take him to my house.

sehun, my mother, and jackson didn't have the best relationship per se so it was best he didn't go inside. they didn't even know sehun was in town but trust me if they did, the universe would collapse and all would die.

my family hated sehun and yes, hated. but that's another story for another day. too many emotions linked to it and i just wasn't ready to bring it up yet.

we just sat in my driveway looking up at my house.

eventually i brought him back to the hotel knowing that chanyeol was probably lonely in the room. which brings us to where we are now.

we sat in silence once again and finally he said "i should probably get going...don't want chanyeol to be alone for too long ya know."

i knew.

"yeah...good idea. text me okay!" i said while unlocking my car.

he reached over and gave me a soft kiss on my lips before smiling and leaving my car.

maybe all would be well.

—

I drove up to my house to see no cars in the driveway.

mom and jackson must be out.

i walked into my house, dropping my keys on the floor and screaming out, "MOM! JACKSON!".

no response.

great, no dinner for me tonight.

—

i sat in my room, legs crossed, watching a movie on my laptop.

i stared at the ceiling for a small while trying to figure out who to talk to.

sehun? no i don't want to take him away from chanyeol.

chanyeol? no because if i speak to him he'll bring up the forbidden topic.

jungkook? lol yeah right.

jaehyun? wait actually why not-

suddenly my thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell ringing, startling me.

i paused my movie and thought to myself who it could be. jackson must've forgotten his house keys. i jumped off my bed and ran down my steps quickly. i unlocked the door and swung it open without looking before running back up to my room.

"last time i'm getting the door for you! don't forget your keys again, you dumbass!" i screamed from the top of the steps as i walked back into my bedroom.

jackson didn't respond but i heard the front door shut so i shrugged it off and closed my bedroom door preparing myself to return back to my movie.

i looked at the empty bowl in my lap and realized that i had run out of popcorn.

"jackson!" i screamed, "be a dear and pop another bag of popcorn for me, please!" i said as sweetly as possible despite the fact that i had just called him a dumbass.

he didn't respond and i huffed while pouting out my bottom lip. guess i'm not getting any popcorn.

suddenly i heard a knock on my bedroom door. it was so weird because jackson never knocked. he had no manners so he would come into my room while i was literally naked taking my phone charger and grabbing whatever else he wanted as if no one was in the room.

that's my brother for you.

i stood up carefully starting to realize something wasn't right. first the doorbell. yeah jackson was stupid but he never usually forgot his keys since he would often come back late and using the doorbell would wake my mom leading to him getting in trouble. then him not responding. yeah jackson would have never gotten me the popcorn but he would've at least yelled something out like, "get your own popcorn, dickhead!". and now this?

i proceeded to grab my door handle but not pushing it, unsure as to what would be on the other end.

but of course i pushed it.

the door swung open and i covered my eyes so quickly to the point i didn't see who was on the other end.

no sound.

i slowly removed my hands from my face to reveal him.

jungkook.

staring at me.

what the fuck?

i stood up as straight as possible since i had hunched down when covering my eyes and tried my best to meet his own eyes despite the fact that he was towering over me.

my breathing quickened as he looked me up and down.

fuck mi na stop. you guys just got in a fight and now you're thinking of doing everything to him.

stop.

but i couldn't. not with the way he was looking at me.

he walked into my room slowly and with each step he got closer to me, causing me to back up slowly and slowly. i looked behind me slightly to see that i was about to trip onto my bed so i changed route towards my wall. he still followed my every step inching closer to me not averting his attention away.

finally i felt my back hit against my wall. fuck.

that didn't stop him as he kept coming towards me, his eyes still watching over me. finally he got as close to me as possible and placed one hand above my head, against the wall.

"i need you. i want you."

and with that i realized that i too needed him and wanted him.

—