little by little | jungkook

thirty nine

song- watch ~ billie eilish

'go ahead and watch my heart burn,
with the fire that you started in me,
but i'll never let you back to put it out .'

—

jungkook p.o.v.

i watched as she slept in the passengers seat snuggled up in her hoodie, the oversized jacket she was wearing, and the blanket i covered over her that i had laying in my backseat.

she whimpered slightly after i went over a rough patch on the road but proceeded to sinking her head deeper underneath the blanket.

i could see her eyebrows and nose scrunch up as she smiled slightly when i turned the radio down to an almost inaudible volume.

she had asked me to just drive around because she slept better inside of a moving car and i wanted to give her everything she asked for so here i was exploring the dark town only being lit by the faint lights scattered around.

i looked over at her once we got to a red light. i honestly had no idea where we were but as long as she was happy, i was happy.

i watched as she brought her hand out from under the blanket and began searching for something. i brought my hand up to her searching hand and she grasped it bringing it to her soft face.

"thank you," she mumbled and i realized it was my hand she was looking for. she leaned it down and brought her face to lay on top of our intertwined hands and let out a soft sigh before returning back to her slumber.

the light turned green and i began driving again, upset that i had to take my eyes away from her.

i snuck one more quick look before turning my full attention to the road ahead.

i looked up at the dark sky and small stars that arranged itself in front of my view.

even though i sat here holding the girl of my dream's hand, i still couldn't help but make a wish.

"please let this never end. if there's anything i want, it's this. i want her." i said out loud for no one in particular.

i couldn't believe that i still wasted my wishes on her even though it seemed like i had her.

but i knew i didn't. not because of sehun but because of her.

she thought i didn't hear her but i did.

she was tired of her own life. and it scared me.

i couldn't lose her. i just couldn't. i wouldn't know what to do with my own life.

so here i sat making another wish.

"and please don't take her away from me...because then you'll be taking my own life away too."

here i sat wasting- no making a wish on a girl who i loved.

it was like she started a fire in me that couldn't be put out.

—