Play To Win || Naruto Fanfic

Failure

They say that the moment before death, your life flashes before your eyes.

Tamako has died plenty of times. 

Whether it be by the hand of Rasa, the C-Rank mission gone wrong, Pein, Tobi, and even a group of Hunter-nin. Some deaths were instantaneously, others were drawn out, and many were miscalculations.

She prided herself in the fact that she didn't fear death, rather she feared failure. Failure meant her impact surmounted to nothing, failure met that her struggle was for naught. Failure meant her life had no meaning.

When she first came into this world, she dreamt the cushy-life of a chunin paper-pusher. In another world, she may have become an Academy Instructor. It was the one thing in life that she knew she liked, in this world so strange, so dangerous and so very horrible.

The rare settlements outside of Sunagakure were often plagued with famine, drought and disease. She would never forget the sight of two children kneeling beside a decomposing body, their fingers kneading and tearing out the flesh into their mouths to drink the putrid brown blood.

She'd thrown up.

Kaito-sensei had laughed at the sight, scolding Tamako with the words, "How dare you waste the precious food you consumed, these kids have nothing yet you taunt them like this."

She'd never killed someone so fast.

That B-Ranked mission changed her life. Tamako knew that a chunin paper-pusher, far from the dangerous of battles and death would have surmount at the most, filing away papers, ignorant of the horrors outside of the safeties in the village.

So she trained for eighteen hours straight, not even blinking when Kaii asked her to stop. Her nights were plagued with the thoughts of how she could change this world, because Naruto wasn't old enough yet.

He was a child, mercilessly beaten and called a demon.

Why did no one help him? She didn't understand. He was the son of the Fourth Hokage, why was no one helping him?

Why was she relying on a child whom no one helped?

Why wasn't there any support system in this goddamn third world nation.

No one helped Kakashi in a way he needed. No one helped Itachi, in fact they ordered him to kill his entire clan, children and infants all the same. No one even thought to put Sasuke through therapy, helped him manage his thoughts in a healthy way. No one.

I have to.

She couldn't just a rely on a kid who didn't have anyone to rely on themselves. This was just sending a message that this world is about giving, giving and giving until you die.

So she reached a hand out to Temari, comforted her in a way that only a bright-eyed child could do. She offered companionship within Kankuro whom people stayed away because of his puppet hobbies. They all knew what happened with the last genius puppeteer.

She tried to talk to Gaara but it was already too late. He had scorned her, tried to crush her alive, shouted painful words "My father accepted you, the village accepted you and has given you all their love. We are different. I have no love."

It bit her at the bottom of her core, this feeling like she'd failed this eleven year old boy, already completing B-Rank missions by himself with gore and blood at his wake. She should've put a stop to this. She had eight years to help Gaara. Befriend him, shower him with love that all children should have.

Tamako bit her lip and turned her heel, promising this would be the last time she failed.

Her next opportunity was with Team 7.