What's the Point?

{Chapter 14}

I flew into my dormitory, not bothering to hold back the sobs. I ran to my bed and curled up on it. No one was in the room, but it wouldn't have mattered if they were. It wasn't like I cared.

I cried and cried and cried. Over and over and over. Hermione hadn't came after me, so I was guessing she hadn't noticed. But Draco had. He had noticed. But I decided that I didn't care about him. He was the stupidest, cockiest, muggle-hating-est, prattiest git I'd ever met in my life.

And he was a tease.

Oh, he was such a tease.

I wailed into my bed sheets, thinking about Draco and his ugly annoying face. Oh, I hated him. I hated him so much. I pledged to myself at that exact moment that I would hate Draco Malfoy until the day I died. And I would be just awful to him. I would ignore everything he did. I would hate everything he loved. And I would never, ever, talk to the bloody git ever again.

But these feelings and thoughts didn't help anything. I was still crying. Crying so hard and loud that my throat and chest were burning.

And I didn't even let up whenever Parvati Patil silently made her way to her bed to grab a spellbook. She had quietly whispered, "Are you alright?"

"Yes," I mumbled in between sobs.

"...Alright...bye..." She eased the door closed. I could practically feel how hard I was being judged by her, but I didn't seem to care. I just wanted to dig myself a hole and crawl in it and die. That's how horrible I felt.

I wasn't just sad. I was heartbroken, lost, empty. I was incomplete. I was mad. I was so very mad. And angry. I was helpless. I felt used. I was desperate. Sorrowful. Lonely. Betrayed. I had been betrayed.

And the worst thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies.

About that time, Mione came rushing in. She completely collapsed onto my bed, exclaiming, "Kenna! Parvati told me that you were in here balling your eyes out and just-just what happened?"

I clung onto her, sobbing into her mass of brown hair. I completely lost it; I just let it all out. "Oh, Hermione! It was just awful! He-he said that he didn't even care! He said that I was just a pathetic blood-traitor! I-I-I thought that he liked me...but I was wrong..." I let out a terrible wail, and she held me.

After a while of just crying and hugging, she finally pushed away, and we sat up on my bed. "Kenna, boys are rubbish. Remember that."

I nodded, then wiped my wet face. "I just...I just thought he was different. I thought he was...good. I thought...I thought he liked me. Maybe even loved..."

"...Did you love him?"

I shrugged. "I dunno. Yes. No. Maybe?" Then I groaned and laid back against my bed. "Oh, Mione, what's the point? What's the point of anything?"

She laughed then laid back, beside me. "I ask myself that almost every day."

There was silence for a while, then I sat up. "Hermione?"

"Yes?"

"I want to hate him. I want to hate him with everything in me, but I just...I just can't. And I don't know why I feel this way, but I just-I just wish that he did love me. Say I'm crazy, but-"

"You're not crazy." She gave me a friendly smile. "You're just in love."

"With Draco?"

"With Draco."

I stared out the foggy window. "He teased me. And now I'm in love with him. And he's not."

"Well...well, that's Malfoy for you. You knew what you were getting into from the beginning."

I nodded. I was just about to open my mouth to say something whenever Ginny bursted through the door, shouting, "Malfoy's at the door! He wants to see you, Kenna!"

I didn't know what to say. What could he possibly want to say to me? Another speech on how I was a worthless blood traitor? No way. No way I would let him get to me. "Tell him...Tell him I hate him." Then, Ginny ran down the stairs, back into the Common Room.

I could hear her voice shout to Draco on the other side of the wall, "She said she hates you!" Wow, Ginny. Real smooth. Then I got to thinking to how I was glad she hadn't sugarcoated it.

She ran back into the dormitory. "He said that he really needs to see you."

I sighed, then quietly and slowly made my way into the common room, and up to the porthole door. I didn't know if I should open it or not. But I took in a deep breath, then eased the door open.

I found a disgruntled Draco standing outside. When he saw me, his face immediately lit up. But I avoided eye-contact. I stepped outside silently, then stared down at my feet.

"Kenna." That was all he said.

"Draco, I don't want to hear it-"

"Kenna, I'm so incredibly stupid. I only said those things because I panicked! I panicked, alright! I know that's not a good enough reason to say those things, but I had to keep my bad boy persona going! I know you won't believe me, and that's not why I'm telling you this. I'm telling you this because I want you to know the truth. When I saw you run away crying, I didn't know what to do. I shoved Ally into Nott's arms and ran after you. I stood in this exact spot, begging the old Fat Lady to let me in, but she wouldn't! And I just...I just really like you, Kenna. I truthfully like you. I know you won't believe me, and that's fine. I don't deserve for you to believe me, but I just wanted you to know. Call me crazy, but-"

"You're not crazy," I smiled. "You're just in love." Then I grabbed his head and pulled him into a rough kiss. He passionately kissed back. His arms were pulling me closer within every second.

When I pushed away, he still was holding my head in his hands. He wiped a single tear from my cheek away. Then we hugged.

"I'm sorry."

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