My Aunt Jillian is coming over for dinner today. Her cat died today so my mom invited her over for dinner. That cat was literally like her child. Frisky was pretty cute too, super nice. I haven't talked to Jillian in awhile. We used to hang out a lot but recently I've kinda cut connections with everyone. I've thought about coming out to her. I think she would accept me. She's one of the only adults I've seriously considered coming out to. The thought of even telling my parents just gives me a headache. Like I'm not even sure how they would feel about it. I know they don't really like gay people but like they're also not really mean. I guess I would say they're your stereotypical American parents when it comes to having a gay son: they're ok with other people being it, but they don't want their kids to be it.
River and Cameron both want to hang out with me tonight. River wants me to come over to his place and Cameron wants to spend the night here or have me spend the night there. He's on his way over right now. I don't know who to go be with. River was being super sweet earlier telling me how much he missed me and how he was worried I stressed myself out too much over him and Cameron. Cameron was texting me about how he wants to hang out. I'm not sure if he actually means hang out or if he wants to do other things. I'm slightly nervous to do anything with either one of them. Like it excites me to think about doing things with River but at the same time I am nervous. I know I'm horny all the time and both of them really turn me on. I made out with River that one time but other than that I've never done anything with someone else. I've especially never let them see my body. Plus what if one of them wants to have sex or something. I want to but at the same time am I ready? Why can't it just be easy? I hear a knock on my door. "Come in." I say loudly. I'm sitting in my office chair. My door opens up and my Aunt Jillian reveals herself.
"Hey sweety." she says smiling.
"Hey." I say smiling. She sits down on my bed. "How are you?" I ask. Jillian is wearing a black shirt, the top going from shoulder to shoulder but dipping in the middle to show slight cleavage. For being 42 Aunt Jillian is a looker. She's not skinny enough to look like a skeleton but at the same time some indents from her bones on her skin are visible. She is extremely beautiful but isn't married.
"I'm fine." she says smiling. "That old cat was bound to die soon. I suppose I'll just have to go get a new one." She puts on another smile. Jillian is a very sweet woman.
"That'll be fun." I say, smiling in return.
"How are you?" she ask. "With the whole moving situation?"
"It's a headache." I say honestly. "I don't wanna leave my friends behind. I just started this thing with this g-" I go to say guy. "Girl." Nice save. I don't think she noticed.
"Is she pretty?" she asks smiling.
"Definitely." I say smiling to myself. Describing River as 'pretty' for some reason makes me want to laugh. Or was I talking about Cameron? Damnit. "If I'm being honest there's actually two girls."
"Two?" she asks, raising her eyebrows.
"Ya. They both really like me but I don't know who I wanna be with."
"That's a tough one. You didn't cheat on one of them did you?"
"No no. I started talking to one but then it got complicated and we stopped being friends so I started talking to someone else but then she came back." I'm so good at using she instead of he.
"Well there's your answer." she says, smiling. I raise my right eyebrow.
"What do you mean?" I'm confused.
"What do I mean? Think about it Shawn. If you really loved this first girl would you have been able to fall in love with a second girl?"
"Well I'm not in love with the new one." I was definitely in love with Cameron though.
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Ambiguous (A Shameron Fanfic)
Romance"Why are you crying?" she finally asks. "I don't know." I say truthfully, moving off her shoulder and drying my tears with my hands. "Are you ashamed of yourself?" she asks me, looking at me as if I were a poorly tied knot about to fall apart. "I...
