Cryptic | yuto adachi (COMPLETED ✔)

Δ 23 Δ

twenty-three

               I woke up in a hospital bed.
              
               As my eyes wander around the white room I saw Yuto by laid down on a small couch and Hongseok was sitted beside me with his hand holding me. Both of them were asleep. I saw my wrist was covered in bandage and I can’t help but feel guilty of the huge mess I’ve caused.
              
               My head was throbbing so hard, it’s like there’s something pounding inside. I can feel something painful on my wrist, maybe because of the cuts I did to myself.
              
               What have I done?
              
               “I’m glad you’re awake.” I heard a raspy voice. It was Yuto’s. “We were so worried about you Kiel.”
              
               “I’m sorry.” I couldn’t help but feel ashamed of what I did. I couldn’t even look t him in the eyes. If guilt comes in waves, today I’m drowning.
              
               “Kiel?” This time the voice came from Hongseok. With his eye still half closed, there was a small smile slowly forming on his lips. “You’re awake.” And his smile grew even bigger and he tightened the grip on my hand. But even though he was smiling, I noticed how exhausted he was. He had these dark circles on under his eyes and by just looking at his state, I knew he was stressed about my situation.
              
               “I’m sorry.” I said in a low tone. “I didn’t realized that I have been so selfish all this time. I was too focused on my pain to the point I forgot yours.” I was fidgetting with my fingers and Hongseok immediately stopped it.
              
               “You don’t have to apologize Kiel. You shouldn’t be validating what you felt. If it hurts you, it hurts you and as your brother it kills me to see you like this. If I could take all the blows I would do it in a heartbeat. You are the only one left. I can’t lose you and I will make sure that you won’t have to go through that again. I promise you that.”
              
               Hongseok is the most understanding person. He knows how to take things lightly and I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I love him with all of my heart and if I had the chance to take back what happened last night, I would. What I did was a really false move and very selfish. I didn‘t think of what other would feel. I thought that maybe if I wasn’t here everything will end when in fact I’m just passing my pain to the people I will leave behind and I don’t want that. I don’t want the people I love to feel that kind of pain, so this time I will do the right thing.
              
               I will end this pain by accepting what happened to me because even if I get angry or kill myself, nothing would ever change. I’ll start to make new happy memories instead of reliving the past and being locked up on it.
              
               “I promise I will make it up to you. All of you.” I turned my gaze from Hongseok then to Yuto, who was quitely listening to our conversation.
              
               “I’m sure you will.” Hongseok smiles. “Now, I’ll leave you two alone for I know you have a lot of catching up to do. I’ll buy some breakfast for us and tell your friends that you’re awake. They’ve been bombarding my phone with so many calls.”
              
               And with that, Hongseok left the room.
              
               I swallowed the lump in my throat upon noticing that it was just Yuto and me. He shifted closer to me by taking Hongseok's place and slowly intertwining his hands with mine which immediately turned me into a red tomato.
              
               “Don’t ever do that to me. You scared me.” Yuto said in a low but serious voice before crashing onto me by hugging me tightly. My slightly tensed body relaxed after I felt his warmth. “God I miss holding you like this.”
              
               I can feel his soft breath on my neck. He had buried his face on my nape and at this very moment, I couldn’t ask for more. I was stupid for not realizing it sooner. That God gave me these people who never gave up on even when I felt like giving up.
             
               Hongseok has always been my rock. He was my father and my mother. Everything that I am today is because of him. He had sacrificed a lot of things for me and I wish him nothing but the best because he deserves it. He deserves all the greatness in this world.
              
               Cris, Kino and Wooseok were my lifesavers. Meeting them was a blessing and I thank God for giving me these friends whom I can always count on.
              
               And lastly, Yuto. Honestly, the idea of us being together was the least thing I’ve thought the moment I moved here. I really didn’t think that he would go after a girl like me. Someone who isn’t much of a pretty face and a patchy past. But right now, as I think of what we were before and what we are now, I couldn’t be more grateful that I met him. Wheh he said he’ll stay no matter what, he really did without hesitations. No matter how many times I pushed him away, he never left. Instead, the more I push him away the more he comes back.
              
               “I’m sorry if I hurt you.”
              
               “You don’t have to say sorry for feeling things. I respect your emotions Kiel and what I had to do was to show you that I’m not gonna leave even when things get rough and don’t tell me you’re not lovable because you are a broken person. I will always keep on telling you. I don’t care about your past, I will keep on loving you and I promise to love every shattered piece of you.”

             I have been spending all my life trying to find where I belong but all these years I have been so blinded to see that this where I’m supposed to be—to the people who had always been here for me.
            
             And inside Yuto’s arms, there I belonged.

-:-:-:-

sorry if this was a bit short, the last two chapters will be hella long so pls bare with me hehe and also, i dont plan on making this story any longer bc i dont want to add more to the storyline bc i honestly thought that its all good

and also, please support my next pentagon fanfiction, it’ll be about Kino this time and in fact i already published a small part of it, once i finished writing ‘cryptic’ ill publish the first chapter (i have been working on it yesterday)

lastly, thank you for the support y'all are the best ily

happy reading!
-d