Chapter 9

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"I thought you was sleeping."

"Yeah well I wasn't." I hissed.

"Don't take that tone with me." He hissed back.

"You know I never wanted to come back here. I wanted to live my life away from you, I promised my little boy that I wouldn't let him live in the trailer park and yet I couldn't do anything to get out of there, but here you were, probably fucking your whores, living your life and swimming in money. You know what I was doing? I was going out at night, leaving my son with the women from the trailer park while I had to sell my body just so I could put food in front of him. I lived off of scraps that he didn't eat, when he was a baby I would have to get extra baby food and eat that with him because that was all I could afford. Here you were, eating food and sleeping on a full stomach, while I was out there starving myself just so my son could eat." I felt tears slip down my cheeks. "You can't just come in here and declare your love for me, and apologise for what you did and think I would forgive you. I will never ever forgive you for what you did to me and my son, you don't deserve my forgiveness."

"Well I didn't ask for you to get pregnant on the first time I slept with you!" He yelled while standing from his chair.

"There wouldn't have been another time after that!" I disputed. I followed his actions and stood from my bed and stormed off to my wardrobe where I still had some fresh clothes that he hadn't put on me. When I turned around he was stood a couple feet behind me.

"Ha course there wouldn't have been another time! You loved it and I knew you would have come to me again!" I scoffed and started to change. "See you are even getting undressed in front of me!"

"That's because you have seen it all before, it doesn't mean I'm just going to drop my underwear and say 'come fuck me', don't be too full of yourself you bastard!" I was about to put on my top when I felt his hand clamp down onto my wrist.

"You're so skinny." His eyes were trailing down my body, my joggers were almost twice my size and the bra I had on was about two sizes too big. I immediately felt disgusted by my body and I tried to pull my hand out of his grasp to cover up but his grip tightened.

"Please let go." I whimpered, my eyes darted to the floor away from his eyes, so I didn't see the disgust behind them. His grip loosened but he never let go, his other hand took hold of my chin which made me flinch back and look into his eyes, I could see the pain and hurt behind them.

"What have I done to you?" He croaked. I saw a tear slide down his cheek, I brought my other hand up to his cheek and wiped it away, the corner of my lips tugged into a toothless smile.

"You broke me."

********

I could hear Rhys giggling at something from the living room while I made my way down the stairs. I instantly ran to where he was and I saw him playing with Damien, or at least Damien was playing with him making silly face to make Rhys laugh. Damien looked up and stared straight at me. "Rhys look who's here?" Damien pointed at me making Rhys turn his head towards me, he couldn't turn it too far but he still caught a glimpse of me.

"It's mummy." Damien cooed, he stood up from the floor and he picked Rhys up and walked over to me, I held out my arms and Damien put Rhys in my arms.

"Hello my baby boy." I smiled. "Mummy's missed you, I have missed you so much." I held his head against my chest and brought my lips to the top of his head and kissed it, my lungs also being filled with his intoxicating scent, which immediately put me at ease knowing that he was well and safe. "Thank you for letting me see him today." 

Damien smiled at me and stared at Rhys who was in my arms. "I'm not going to keep his mother away from him when all she wanted to do was give him a better life."

"Okay." I whispered while slightly nodding my head. "When do I start?" He looked away from Rhys and looked up at me. 

"Start what?"

"Work?"

"Oh work, let's say 8:30."

"8:30. That works. Also can you move Rhys into my room, I don't like it when I am away from him."

"Yeah sure. Whatever makes you comfortable, don't be afraid to ask for it."

"Thanks. I'm going to go and have a bath, can you bring Rhys up?"

"Of course. In my room, there is some bubble bath there and you can use everything else in there too." 

"Thanks." I passed Rhys back to him and made my way to my bathroom. After running the water for about 10 minutes it was full and steaming. I stripped out of my clothes and climbed into the bath, this is the first hot bath I have had in 2 and a half years. I couldn't ever afford hot water in the trailer, so I had to live with cold water, if I wanted hot I would have to boil the kettle and I only did that so Rhys could have a hot bath, I wasn't going to make him have a cold bath because I couldn't afford hot water. 

There was a knock at the door and I slid down the bath so the water would cover up my shoulders. "Come in." I half-yelled. The door clicked open and Damien entered the room. 

"I was just coming up to tell you that I have moved Rhys' cot into your room, he's asleep right now. Once you have finished your bath can you come to my office, I need a quick word." My heart started to race when he said the word office, the last time I had been in there was when my whole life started to go down hill.

"Sure." He gave me a half-hearted smile and left the room. I sighed and dipped myself into the bath even further so it covered my whole body. Might as well wash my hair and then go to my doom. 

Great. 

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