My sister's fiance Book 1 [complete]

32.

I can't believe I am all packed and ready to leave. I just hope there isn't an obstacle in my way to stop me because I think I would stop if he ever shows up again and he tries hard enough.

Love makes you weak. It makes you blind even but somehow I opened my eyes but I preferred if I had walked around with my eyes closed because seeing is so exhausting.

I would have never seen that what I was doing was wrong. I would only love and love only and if there was a wall I would walk straight in to it because my eyes were closed.

There's a disadvantage in not seeing. A consequence but I would have suffered it if it meant that I would still have love. That I would still have him.

We only needed love but I opened my eyes and ruined things for us. So I can't stay and watch my mistake. I must run and I must hide from all of this before it comes back and bite me in the ass as they would say.

It feels like just yesterday we were running around hiding from everyone's eyes and having fun like we would never fall in love. We didn't care about the people we would hurt or the effect all of it was having on the both of us.

We were having fun not looking for love only a fun time. Maybe if we never had love for each other before we would never have catch the feeling again.

Who am I kidding? With or without old feelings I was going to fall for him anyway. He is what I have always been looking for and I wanted him so much. I wish it was just lust for us when we met again but old feelings never die. Do they?

I felt the pull when I saw him at the bar, when I woke up in his bed and smile and the moment I saw him when he was introduced as my sister's fiance. That pull was always there but I ignored it but when it got to the point that I could not ignore it anymore I accepted it but I did not voice it out loud to anyone but my best friend and I think my father has a clue. With all that I have told him.

Ethan POV

Why as life been so cruel to me that I have to get married to someone that I don't love and will never love. The only love I would hold for is the love of a sister because she is the sister of my true love.

I could never give my heart to her because it belongs to someone else and it will always belong to someone else.

I wanted to call off the wedding but I could not. She doesn't want me, she doesn't feel the same way about me and she is with someone else. It hurt and I'll be throwing away everything but I could never be with her. I don't want her to hate me if I embarrass and hurt her family and sister.

At least I would be close to her but so far away. I don't think she will ever let what happened between us happen again.

Will I be able to forget about her about us? Will I be able to go through with this marriage? Will her sister forgive me if I told her about her sister and i? Will they be able to forgive me if I come clean?

I never knew that it would have lead to this. I know she was having second thoughts and regretting that she has ever been with me but I never knew she would have end us.

I thought she would have done anything for us to be together as I would but I was wrong. She made me fall in love with her again while she watch me fall over and over at her feet.

She only took my heart in her hands has I held it out to her. I guess that's fair since I did that to her once but at least I tried to fix it and return it but she shut me out.

I sighed again for the millionth time today running my fingers through my hair causing some of it to stick out and out of place.

I need my mind to rest but it's been running a marathon for the past few days. Thinking of the what ifs and the suppose and also the dream I'll never have. Thinking about her. What we have lost.