Little Monster [An alternate storyline]

Scores

"26!" Kisame called, a body hitting the ground will a dull thud, it's head missing.

"Ha!" Zabuza snorted. "I'm at 29!"

"Are you sure you aren't fudging your count?" Kisame huffed, narrowing his eyes.

"No!" Zabuza immediately yelled back.

"I'm at 38." Itachi said, coldly cutting down enemies.

"The fuck?!" Kisame roared.

"How?!" Zabuza exclaimed.

"Genjutsu," He shrugged. "I made them fight each other to the death."

"Does that count?!" Kisame asked.

"Beats me, you made the rules!" Zabuza replied.

From off to their right a snake exploded, coating almost everything within 50 feet in blood and guts.

"Deidara!" Sasori screamed. "You idiot!"

"Art!" He screamed back.

"SNAKE GUTS ARE NOT ART!" Sasori wailed. "THERE ARE SNAKE GUTS WHERE SNAKE GUTS SHOULD NEVER BE!"

"Hey, Sasori!" Kisame called out. "What's your count?!"

"I lost count after 36." He grunted.

"I'm at 27!" Deidara exclaimed. "Or was it more..."

"Deidara has killed more snakes than people." Sasori sighed.

"What?" Deidara huffed. "I like watching them explode."

"Snake kills don't count!" Kisame exclaimed. "I already said that!"

"Fine!" Deidara pouted. "I just won't participate!"

Itachi rolled his eyes, embedding a kunai between a shinobi's eyes.

"Stop bickering," Itachi hissed. "Let's just get this done and get out of here."

"What's up with you?" Zabuza asked.

"This was Itachi's home village," Kisame replied. "He probably doesn't want to be spotted."

"Makes sense," Zabuza shrugged. "I probably won't ever step foot in Kiri ever again."

Kisame nodded, Samehada piercing through a man's chest cavity.

"30!"

"Fuck off!"

~~~~~

A cloud of smoke enveloped the clearing, making Kana squint in an attempt to see what had appeared. When the smoke did finally clear, Naruto stood on top of a giant toad, wearing a blue and white robe. A sword was strapped to its side in a sheath.

"FROG!" Hidan screamed.

"Thanks, Captain Obvious," Kakazu grumbled. "Like we all couldn't see the giant frog."

"What exactly is Naruto's plan?" Azumi asked nervously.

Sasuke shrugged, Haku and Kana both chuckling nervously. Choji pulled chips from his pockets, shoving a handful into his mouth.

"I'm sure he has some kind of plan." He said, seemingly the only one with faith in Naruto.

"Now I feel useless," Hidan huffed, crossing his arms. "I wanted to kill more shit."

Kakazu shrugged. "We're just here to help."

Naruto began yelling at the frog, waving his hands around to emphasize whatever it was he was saying. Once they finished yelling, he ran down the frog's side using chakra, landing on the ground gracefully and running at Sasuke.