Untold. // Phan

Chapter 32

WARNING: DRUGS (MUSHROOMS), MENTION OF SUICIDE

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Dan's POV

After that I started to feel better. I wasn't feeling well, not even nearly, but it was getting better. Very slowly. At least I wanted to tell myself that.

I started going to school again and catching up on all the stuff I had missed with Phil. I couldn't fail this class again.

Phil was with me all the time. He also didn't allow me to continue to encapsulate myself and get back into the same situation where I just lay in bed and didn't want to see or hear anyone. I personally didn't want to go back to this situation either. I just wanted me to feel better.

After school, PJ announced that his parents would leave for the weekend and he would throw a small house party. Of course I got involved.

"Do you really think that's a good idea?" Phil asked skeptically as he picked me up.

"Why not? I always wanted to party with you." I tied my shoes.

"Yes, but we can always catch up on that." He still sounded worried and I straightened up.

"You're there, right?" I kissed him briefly. He nodded.

And so I found myself with Phil and a red plastic cup on PJ's couch again. We chatted with the guys for a while until Phil disappeared from the scene and talked to other people I didn't know about.

I stayed on the couch and poured one plastic cup after another into me.

"Why so lonely?" Some guy I didn't know asked me suddenly. I just stared at him until he sat next to me.

"Not so talkative." He laughed. He was probably already drunk. I took a sip. Phil looked over at me briefly and smiled at me.

"I could have something there that could lift your spirits." He said at some point and from that moment on I started to listen. I turned my head to look at him. He grinned dirty at me.

"And what exactly would that be?" He just grinned at me until he got up. I looked at him confused.

"Come with me." Actually, I shouldn't have trusted him. Just go away with some guy I didn't even know. But I just didn't care in my half drunk brain. I could be better, so why the hell not?

So I got up, put my plastic cup on the table and went after him. We ran up a flight of stairs, walked through some door, and arrived in a bathroom.

Then he pulled something out of his jacket.

"What's that?" I asked, my face twisted. The contents of the bag looked really gross.

"Mushrooms." He replied and I looked at him with wide eyes. It felt like I was sober again. "Are you up for?"

"Fuck, yes." He grinned, opened the bag and handed me a nasty piece.

"Have you ever taken mushrooms?" I shook my head. "Totally disgusting."

And yes, it was totally disgusting. It tasted like shit and the concession was disgusting too. I was really close to puke, but that wouldn't fulfill the purpose.

I had no idea about mushrooms. I had no idea of ​​anything.

I felt sick. Somewhat disgusted, I ran down the stairs again, towards the kitchen where I prepared a new drink directly to wash away the disgusting taste. Suddenly Phil was right next to me.

"Hey, pretty boy." I grinned and he rolled his eyes. At least, his worried expression was gone for a second.

"Are you alright?" I nodded and took a sip from my cup.

"How does PJ know them all?" I asked as I looked around the room and Phil just shrugged his shoulders.

"No idea. I'm sure he doesn't know them all." He laughed and I would have kissed him, if we wouldn't be at a party with many drunk teenagers.

Then someone spoke to Phil and I was left behind in the kitchen.

And after a few minutes the effect started. I felt warm as if someone were hugging me from the inside and I just wanted to lie down on the couch and fall asleep. I was so... calm. It was all so slow, so quiet, so relaxed.

I was still a bit sick, but it would surely go away. It was difficult for me to keep myself on my feet. As if I was rocking back and forth all the time, like a ship.

Lukas spoke to me at some point, asked if everything was okay and laughed when he noticed how drunk I was. He was no better.

"Howell's fine." He laughed and patted me on the shoulder.

At some point I decided to go upstairs just to have some me time. There were too many people downstairs. I ran up the stairs, which took a thousand times longer than a normal person. Afterwards I strolled through the hallway, which seemed never ending to me. I couldn't run a straight line, I kept grazing the wall on the right and left.

And suddenly it felt like I was in our old house in Wokingham. Like I'm roaming the house to find my mom. My heart started to beat faster. At some point I just opened a door and then I saw her hanging there. Just like about two years ago, exactly the same picture. The picture that I tried to suppress so much.

I stopped dead and just stared into the room until I blinked and then it was just a dark bedroom. I felt something, but couldn't make out what it was.

Was I just drunk? High? Was i sick? Did I have to throw up? Did I have to cry?

I was suddenly angry. Full of energy and found myself just running down the stairs and out of the house. I heard my name but didn't respond. The cold air hit me in the face but I managed to ignore it.

I heard my name, heard it was Phil, heard his footsteps as he ran after me.

"Where the hell are you going?!" he shouted behind me.

"Home!"

"That's in the next village. Dan, you can't go home!" Suddenly he was next to me, grabbing my wrist for me to move away aggressively. He looked at me in shock. I stopped.

"What's going on?" He asked, scared and if I wasn't so fucking high and angry, I would have been sorry.

"I want to go home. I just want to go home. I wanna go home." I rambled.

"What happened? Why are you so angry?"

"I'm not angry."

"You are."

"Fuck you." I hissed and Phil backed away.

"Are you high?" Phil suddenly realized. I didn't answer, just started to walk away again.

"Do you want to run all the way?" he asked shocked.

"Why the fuck not?!"

"Do you really want to go home like this?"

"Just leave me alone, holy fuck Phil!" I turned abruptly and he stopped dead. He was like a dog.

"I won't let you go alone." I rolled my eyes and continued on my way. He followed a bit behind.

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