The King's Gold

Love Is A Tomorrow Not A Yesterday

Yashima awoke early again from his nightmares with tears streaming down his face and shot up out of bed only to whimper in pain when he suddenly felt an ache in his lower belly.

He didn't know how to think or react in fact he hadn't known since he first discovered that he was carrying a tiny baby inside.

He hadn't found out until a week ago which was awfully late but he was downgraded in his prostitution status which meant he got less food than normal which was already less than prostitutes of higher status.

He only got half a bowl of rice before and now he only got a quarter of rice and so he assumed that the reason why he wasn't visited by his monthly visitor and why he was throwing up every morning was that he was more hungry and eating less.

When he learned that he was with child it was when his childhood friend Alia came to ask if she could draw him, she was an artist and she loved to draw him ever since they were young but he normally never let her until this time since he had missed her and needed a friend.

He broke down and told her everything… he cried in her arms as she held him and seemingly out of nowhere she put her hand on his belly were to both of their surprise there was a small bump and that could only mean one thing.

Ever since that moment life had been a daze almost like he wasn't even there or anywhere just floating through life without time or emotions but at this pain in his belly, he was seemingly shocked out of it all.

My… my little one!

My baby!

Something is wrong!

Oh no!... I haven't eaten in a few days...I hurt my baby!

I'm starving my baby!

He felt tears in his eyes again this time of so many emotions.

This was the first time he had thought about the fact that he was now a momma and now he was terrified that he may have hurt or even… miscarried his child.

He felt so sorry and ashamed.

I'm so sorry!

No momma wants to hurt their baby!

I'm so terrible!

I was so lost that I forgot about you!

He started to pray to every God he could think of for his baby to not be dead as he grabbed a bowl of cold old rice and ate as much as he could.

Every time he had been brought food he had left it in the corner and he hadn't eaten any of it but now he was determined to eat as much of the rice as he could.

"I'm so sorry my darling I'm a bad momma! I never ever meant to starve you!"

He felt light-headed and so he gently as possible laid back down in bed but he bunched up his blanket and rested it under himself as to add more cushion for his belly.

"There! My little baby!"

He couldn't help but softly smile as he put his hand over his belly protectively.

He should have had a bigger belly by now since he had to be at least four months along but he supposed the lack of food and care had something to do with that.

"I'm so sorry my little sweet baby! I love you so much already, in fact, I think you're my whole world!...if you do die I don't think I could keep on going!"