All That We Are...

Chapter 31

Carter

Lifting the bottom of my shirt I place it to my face and ugly cry into it. I just watched my whole world drive away from me not knowing when or if I'll ever see her again. What if something happens like they get into an accident or they never come back to get us. Fuck what did I do? I made her leave not even knowing how secure everything is.

"We have to go get them." I say and start pacing.

"Carter we did the right thing." Roger try's to tell me as I push my hair from my face.

"None of us know that. If something happens I'll never be able to forgive myself. I forced her to do this." Placing his hands on my shoulders he stops me for making my very own walk way.

"Listen to me Carter. None of us know what tomorrow is going to bring all we can go on is what we know. Right now we know that they are going somewhere safe and we have to wait. They will be back though there's no way they are going to leave real living and breathing human beings behind." He seems pretty sure of that. Trusting in him I nod and he feels I'm okay enough to let go of me.

"It just sucks Roger." I hang my head.

"I know son. She's a great girl and it makes me happy knowing she has someone like you fighting for her."

"I love her. I've never loved anyone just her."

"And that love you have for each other will eventually bring you both together again, don't let that feeling go away." He pats my back and walks into the house.

"I never will." I say just to myself.

I walk around the house like ten times just trying to find something to get my mind off of Henley. I even wished for a group of those fuckers to come around just so I could shove my knife into something, but they don't. Nothing comes around its so quiet it almost makes my skin crawl. I even debated going to talk to Christian then decided against it because I still really hate him. Stepping into the barn I pull back the sheet revealing my little cot that has wrinkled up blankets. The first time I had sex with Henley was right there. She owned me completely after that night. Everything about me is her. Taking the picture of her out of my wallet I lay back on the small bed and stare at it. My chest grows heavy as I look at it hoping I'll be able to see all these beautiful facial features in real life again soon.

"Hey, um Roger has dinner made. Asked me to come and get you." Christians standing in the entry way.

"I'm not hungry." I tell him as I carefully shove the picture back into my wallet.

"He said you didn't have to eat. He needs you inside though, there's some things he wants to go over." He is still standing there. When I lift my head to glare at him he just shrugs his shoulders and walks away. Fuck, can't a guy just have some peace to wallow by himself. No of course not. Standing I sigh loudly and throw the rest of my shit I have in here into a bag. I've been staying in Henley's room anyways so a lot of my stuff is already in there. Might as well bring the rest up to it considering Im thinking of barricading myself in there because it smells like her, it's all her and that's all I want.

Once I arrive in the kitchen everyone is sitting down. Roger picks at his plate while Christian devours his and Max well he still looks like he is about ready to break something. I try to eat just because it's a shame to waste it but with every bite I take makes it harder to swallow that I eventually give up and push my plate to the side. Looking around the room I notice some candles are lite. The light in the kitchen and hallway are on only because the generator is hooked up to run those. I'm pretty sure Cynthia said her people had gone to turn the power back on, it's been a few hours it should be back by now.