Forever and Always (Romanogers fanfic)

Chapter 9

Natasha's POV

I quietly walked down the stairs to the living room. It was 10:00 so I expected everyone to already be up. I stopped in the door way. I had caused a lot of trouble yesterday, mabye I should just go back upstairs.

As I turned I heard my name called out. "Good morning Nat!" Clint smiled. I nodded, "Morning."

Clint could tell I was uncomfortable and he stood up and walked towards me. My body tensed, "Hey, it's alright." He reassured me. I still wasn't entirely convinced but I let him hug me anyway.

"Do you want some breakfast?" Clint asked nodding towards the kitchen. I shook my head and started towards an arm chair. Clint grabbed my arm, "Natasha-" he raised an eyebrow. I glared at him, "I'm fine, okay? I'm not hungry."

I thought I had him till he saw my right arm. "Nat, why on earth-" "It's nothing!" I snapped jerking away my arm. Clint rolled his eyes, "I'm just trying to help you, stop pushing me away!"

It was the same thing he'd said yesterday. After I fell asleep he took me to a guest room. When I woke up I shouted at him and ran for the roof again. Only this time Tony was there to stop me.

"I don't need your help Barton, leave me alone!" I slumped into the chair and glared after Clint as he stomped out of the room.

I suddenly felt a lot of eyes on me. My right arm had fresh cuts on it. "Nata-" Tony started to say, "What!?" My head snapped up. He sighed, "Please eat something. Then go apologize to Clint, he's only trying to be there for you."

I stood up stiffly and walked over to the kitchen. I picked up an apple and sat back down. I eyed my teammates and Bruce raised his eyebrows. I shrugged as if to say 'what'. He jerked his head towards Bucky and mouthed, "Apologize."

"Uh, Bucky." I cleared my throat. Bucky's head shot up, "Yes?" he said quietly. I shifted in my seat, "I'm sorry for yesterday." I breathed out. He shrugged, "It's fine. I guess you didn't know how much it would effect me." I narrowed my eyes, "Are you trying to guilt trip me?" Bucky shook his head, "No, no. It's just that-" he paused. Bucky's eyes studied me for a moment. "Uh, Natasha...I love you."

~~~~~~~~~

"What!?" I shouted at Bucky, "You love me?" He nodded and I started towards him. I grabbed his shirt collar and slammed him into the wall. "I hate, I absolutely hate your guts!" I screamed at him. I lifted my fist and punched him across the face. Bucky's nose started bleeding and I let go. "Never speak to me again!" I shouted running out of the room.

I grabbed my jacket and ran out of the building. That's why Bucky didn't stop Steve from going. He loves me.

I felt a sick feeling in my stomach, like I was betraying Steve. I don't know why, I wasn't.

I stopped running when I realized I hadn't the slightest clue where I was headed. Why not the place where it all began? I nodded to myself and set off down the road.

~~~~~~~~~~

I checked my watch, it was 12. It had taken me two hours to walk to my old house. Instead of going directly there I stopped at the local park.

It was a small park, grey and old. It seemed quite depressing now that I looked at it. The swings swung lightly by themselves in the wind. Like there were ghost children playing on them. The slide was rusty and the puzzles next to it were fading away.

All the hedges needed attending to. They jutted out in odd directions. The trees had a dying look to them and the atmosphere was dull.

I sat on a bench that had chipped paint work. I hugged my knees to my chest and rested my head on them.  There wasn't really anyone in the park. A child with her mother playing on a climbing frame. A few old couples staring at nothing. Must be pretty bored, I thought. Then a group of teenagers hanging out in a corner. The mother of the little girl had another daughter. A teenage girl of about 16. She sat reading a book, minding her own business.